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This is what I often find myself telling friends and colleagues who have become avid readers of Cosmo.ph’s highly popular Bedroom Blog by Veronica when they ask me if I’m the real author of that blog. And sometimes, even saying an outright “no” is not enough to convince them. “Ows? Parang ikaw e. Dali na, secret lang, promise,” they’d prod.

When a really close friend (who pretty much knows all my dating exploits and love woes) asked me who the author of Bedroom Blog is, suspecting it was me, perhaps, I had to ask her: Why do you think people who know me think I wrote the blog? Her answer: “Kasi pareho kayo—magulo rin ang love life mo.”

I had to laugh in agreement at that one. It’s true: it seems I’ve been entertaining (and often horrifying) my friends with anecdotes about my unthinkable dating experiences, stories of love found and too-quickly lost, and, of course, profiles of the men who figured in these colorful stories since as far as I can remember. I've had my share of Matts and Sams--there's even one who's both my Matt and Sam. It was also because of this that they’ve come to conclude I attract “the worst” kinds of men (who look normal and good from the onset, mind you), and are incredulous each time the next one seems to “out-worst” the previous one. I myself am mystified how I end up getting myself in such situations sometimes.

After listing things I’ve learned from 2009 in this post, and mentally listing the men I’ve seen in the past several years since I first knew the word “dating,” I came to this conclusion: all men of past are soo 2009. And I’m not bringing them with me to 2010.

The time I decided that, it was fairly easy. It even made me feel a whole lot better and lighter. But I guess where you decide to do a good thing you’ve been putting off for quite some time, temptation can’t be far behind. Men who’ve figured both in my recent and not-so-recent past materialized out of nowhere, like ghosts determined to haunt me for all of my singlehood.

As I continue my hard battle to keep them from invading my precious 2010, I am consoled that I am not alone. Friends offer their great company (whether to nights out in the town or to out of town trips) just to keep my mind off these people. They also offer much-needed (although often ignored) words of warning, reminder, and advice. One of the things I remember is Cosmo Chief Zo Aguila quoting something former Cosmo Chief Myrza Sison wrote for Good Housekeeping magazine: “Love is easy.”

And indeed, it should be. The reason I, just like so many other women like me, always bemoan my love life is that I keep it complicated and full of drama. But now I’m starting to see that the key really is to keep things—keep love—simple. If the one you love doesn’t like you back, it’s not your loss; why agonize over unrequited love? If someone likes you, and you like them back, why play games? If your gut is telling you to stay away from that dubious male character, why stick around just because he’s a "pretty boy"—just a "pretty boy"? You get my drift.

So, Cosmo chicks, now that the first month of 2010 has ended and we welcome the second one with Valentine’s Day plans or secret hopes of snagging a date in time, spare yourself the drama--you're far too busy and fabulous for that. Keep what Myrza said in mind. It’s all really very simple—the way your wonderful love life should be. In other words, let's not be Veronicas of the Matt era--a lot of us can relate to that phase of her life far too well, it's scary.

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