We’ve all been there: In our hurry to send that message and get on with our lives, we fail to see that we’ve sent the wrong message to the right person, or sent the right message to the wrong person. But what if, instead of just any wrong message, you sent a nudie, and instead of just any wrong person, you sent it to, like, your boss?
We got real people to share the most embarrassing message they’ve sent or received—from text and email bloopers to snail mail and screen share snafus. Read on for 17 hilarious cautionary tales that will have you double-checking—no, TRIPLE-checking—your own messages.
Always, always, ALWAYS check the recipient field.
“‘Babe, turuan mo akong maglandi kay _____’”—sent to the guy in question instead of the friend I had meant to send it to. He didn’t reply. We were co-workers, so for a week after that, I just avoided him. He later invited me to have lunch with him, and tinanong niya ako ano daw ‘yung text ko sa kanya a week ago. Sabi ko na lang we were playing truth or dare that night, and that was the dare I got, to text him that. He just laughed. I think he eventually figured out I had a crush on him though.” –Pat, 24
“I was taking a selfie via Facebook Messenger. I didn’t shower that day and I was in my PJs, yet gandang-gandang ako sa sarili ko. I decided to send the photo to myself on Messenger so I could delete it because photos take up space on my phone. But I accidentally sent it to a male Facebook friend whom I had never personally met. I was so embarrassed that I said, ‘That’s not for you! Please send it back to me.’ Which sounded pretty stupid and made it even more embarrassing. And he really did send it back to me! I was like, ‘OMG, ang pangit ko pala.’ –Kristine, 27
“Years ago, there was a guy who was very makulit in texting me, although he was nice naman. I texted my boyfriend, with whom I was in an LDR at the time, ‘ANG KULIT NITO. TINATANONG NA NAMAN AKO KUNG ANONG GAGAWIN KO SA SUNDAY. ANG PANGIT NAMAN NIYA. KAPAL.’ I hit SEND, and mistakenly sent it to the guy I was talking about. I tried to turn off my phone so the message wouldn’t deliver, pero wala na. Na-send na. He replied, ‘Bakit ganyan ka?’ I was mortified.” -K, 27
Take extra caution when corresponding with work contacts.
“I once had a boss who was very demanding and no one could seem to stand up to her. One time, at about 7 p.m., she wanted me to stay in the office longer for a project that I could totally do the next day. I stood up and said I had a life and that I would work on it first thing tomorrow. My heart was beating fast while I texted my colleague, who witnessed the entire thing, this message: ‘There, I totally walked out and left her in shock.’ It was too late for me to realize that I actually sent it to my boss. She replied, ‘What do you mean?’ I’m pretty sure she knew what I meant, because she gave me the cold shoulder the following days.” –Becca, 29
“I was tasked by my former boss, a university director, to watch an NCAA basketball game so that I could relay details of the event to him and he could tell the board how participative he was in school activities and boast that he was there. It was a Saturday, and I was so angry that I had to work. I was simultaneously texting my boss to give an in-depth account of the ball game and texting my girlfriend. I mistakenly sent my boss this message intended for my girlfriend: ‘P***, boss ko pasikat!’” –Tom, 25
“One morning a few months into my first job, I was going through emails and happened upon this forwarded email featuring photos of dicks in hilarious poses, like a dick stuck into a stiletto—you get the picture. It was so funny that I told my co-worker, who was seated across me, that I would forward it to him. A moment later I asked him if he had gotten it, and he said that he still hadn’t, which was weird. I checked the email and realized I had sent it to an accomplished professional contact I had met only once before. SUPER CRINGE TO THE NTH LEVEL.” –Trisha, 31
“I had a teleconference with a global head for enterprise data security at a major company. I was doing a screen share through Google Hangouts, and for some reason I accidentally opened a browser tab with Pornhub loaded in its full glory. She’s a very open-minded lady in her 60s and a mother of four. She just laughed out loud and said, ‘Well, boys will be boys.’” –Cris, 37
Take even more caution when sending messages of a, uh, sensitive nature.
“On WeChat, there’s a ‘People Nearby’ feature which lets you connect with other WeChat users close to you geographically. My profile pic was a pic of a cute puppy, so this guy probably thought babae ako. And he also had a picture of a woman as his profile pic, so I started flirting with him. When we got to the ‘send nudes’ part of the conversation, of course I said siya una mag-send. Lo and behold, nagpadala ng dick pic—his dick is pierced, BTW—with face pa talaga. I was like, ‘DUDE, LALAKE KA DIN PALA!’ He blocked me right after.” –Ryan, 33
“I have a habit of sending my missus a selfie while in the toilet. There was this one time, I was about to meet with a potential agency for a business I was handling. While waiting for the agency’s rep in a coffee shop, my tummy ached, so naturally, I went to the toilet. I grimaced in a selfie—nothing below the tummy was seen, but I was topless in it because it was an intense number two and I didn’t want to wrinkle my plantsado polo—and accidentally sent it to the agency rep instead of the missus. And that’s the day I briefly stopped sending number two selfies to the missus.” –Marc, 30
“A friend whose BF had the same name as me sent me the nitty-gritty of how she enjoyed their sex the previous night, then asked if they could role-play for their next session, something about being a naughty high school student in uniform and him being a stern math professor. The rest ‘di ko kayang i-share. Dedma lang ako. Never heard from her since.” –Ian, 34
Check your spelling, and remember, it’s “tito,” not “titi.”
“While I was working at a hotel, I was working the graveyard shift and would normally be home around nine in the morning. My mom asked me what I wanted for breakfast. Since I was craving bangus that day, I texted her so, but it came out as ‘Can I have Bang Bus today?!’ My phone, back then a Nokia 7110, had a predictive text feature through its built-in dictionary, and Bang Bus—a reality porn website where people do it in a moving van—was in it because I often mentioned it in texts to friends. So my mum asked my sister, ‘What’s Bang Bus?’ My sister knew what it was, but she covered for me by saying it was just a typo kasi puyat ako. At least I still ended up having that bangus!” –Lawrence, 35
“When my dad was in the hospital, I was texting my tito about my dad’s condition. He said, ‘Okay, please notify us of further updates’ to which I replied ‘Okay po, titi.’ I immediately said it was a typo as soon as I noticed the mistake. He replied, ‘Okay, God bless you,’ as if subtly driving out my demons.” –Akiko, 27
Cases of mistaken identity can quickly turn into cases of SHAME.
“In my phonebook there were two Johns, and I failed to put surnames that would distinguish them from each other. One was my high school classmate, very wholesome, religious, an active church leader. The other was a basketball teammate and drinking buddy. I texted one of the Johns and asked if he was free that night because the basketball gang would be going on a night-out and one of our plans was to visit a well-known girlie bar. I got this reply: ‘Hi, this is the girlfriend of John. Sorry ‘di pa siya maka-reply ngayon, nasa Bible study pa kasi siya...’” –Rudolph, 29
“I was student council chair of our college and spearheading preps for a major student activity. We needed to send letters to heads of university departments urgently. I hastily made one addressed to a ‘Mr. Mario _____’ and had it delivered to his office. The following day, I received more than just word that he had approved my request; I was informed that his first name was NOT Mario. It was a moniker used by students behind his back because he had the built, moustache, and look of Mario from Super Mario Bros.—a moniker he was aware of. When he saw me that same day, he gave me dagger looks! I approached him and said an embarrassed sorry; he just nodded. If he’s reading this now, I hope he did forgive me, and I’m grateful he was a sport about it. And if he could forgive me just one more time, I still cannot recall his real first name. Sorry!” –Diosa, 33
It’s never wise to text, much less send pics, while the devil (aka alcohol) is inside you.
“While a drunk male friend and I were chatting online, he joked about sending a dick pic. I just played along since I couldn’t sleep that night and I didn’t think he’d really do it. A few minutes later, I received a video clip of him pulling his D out. I smirked then took a screenshot. The next morning, I sent him the screenshot. He was so mortified, all he could do was say ‘NO’ and apologize over and over again.” –Aika, 25
“I had a flirtation going with this guy to whom I’d often send selfies. One time while I was tipsy and soaking in a bathtub, we were joking about poop on WhatsApp. I took a photo of myself in the bathtub and prepared to send it to him with the caption: ‘Want to join me in my poop bath?’ Only I didn’t send it to him. I mistakenly uploaded it as a status update, which any of my WhatsApp contacts could view once uploaded. Panicked, I tried to find ways to stop the photo from uploading, all while my life of relative dignity thus far flashed before my eyes. Good thing my Internet connection was slow and I was able to delete the photo before the upload finished. A month later, a hung-over me made the same mistake of uploading a selfie meant for the same guy as a status update. This time, the photo went through and was actually displayed for a few minutes before I realized my mistake. Good thing I wasn’t naked this time around.” –Cherry, 33