Ah, weddings. Surely no woman is naive enough to think her special day will go off without a hitch! There's always something, right? And oftentimes, it's clueless guests who don't have even a light grip on what the word "etiquette" means.
In an unintentional way of making you feel good about your life choices, Redditors have gathered to share some of the most awful and awkward things guests have down at their weddings. Heads up: You probably won't want to invite these folks to your nuptials, or to any event, for that matter.
(Answers have been edited for punctuation and spelling.)
1. That time there was cake snatching.
Everyone wants a piece of delicious wedding cake, right? Indeed. Some people even want it all to themselves.
"I went to this wedding that I really didn't want to go to and this random middle-aged woman takes the top part of the cake and scurries away," sorry_my_bad writes. "Like, doesn't even take a car. She just runs. Away. On foot. With a third of a wedding cake in her hands. It took awhile for people to notice, but apparently no one knew her."
2. That time the mother-in-law delivered on stereotypes.
What's a wedding without some sass from in-laws? "We had a small wedding, officiated by a friend of ours. My MIL [mother-in-law] sat there and rolled her eyes the entire time," Drake Maijstral writes. "Guess who wanted us to have a large, lavish, and expensive wedding? Neither my wife nor I were amused."
3. That time a guest wore her own wedding dress.
It's fun to match with your best friend...that is, unless you're the bride. "My old roommate wore her wedding dress to my wedding," parkitintherear writes. "Not a dress that was white or looked like a wedding dress. The actual dress she wore to her wedding a few months earlier. Who does that?" Some people are just really, really desperate to find excuses to wear their wedding gowns again.
4. That time a couple showed up to the wrong wedding.
"At my best friend's wedding, one couple showed up, signed the guest log, which has the marrying couple's names on it, sat down, and then finally realized about five minutes later that they were at the wrong wedding when they didn't recognize anyone," cereal130 writes. "My buddy and his new wife actually thought it was pretty funny and will point out the random couple's names to people if that story comes up."
5. That time the mother-in-law was just plain mean.
"My MIL saw my wedding dress and told me I should get another one because it was too plain and my future husband would be disappointed when he saw me walking down the aisle :(," redgladiola.
6. That time a guest ruined the bride's dress.
This one's a double offender for gift snatching and messing up the bride's dress. "My cousin swiped one of our gifts, a $800 3-liter bottle of wine, opened it, and as she was walking toward where everyone was sitting, she tripped and proceeded to spill a good amount of it all over my wife's wedding dress," nosexpantherbyodeon writes. "Luckily, it was at the very end of the night. We remind her of this every holiday she is at our house by giving her a plastic cup with a lid on it to use."
7. That time a guest invited their own guests.
Talking about wedding crashers in the most literal sense. "People writing in the names of other people to their RSVP," tmilligan10 writes. "People adding the uninvited children, or a +1 they didn't receive is pretty normal. Rude...but normal. I've had people add an entirely different couple to their RSVP. Like they wanted to double-date or something. It was ridiculous."
"A wedding I'm in on Saturday had someone RSVP with TWELVE added guests," addmonroe chimed in. "Yes, I said twelve. Some people have no concept of how the world works I guess."
8. That time a guest totally flouted the dress code.
Some people don't realize that weddings are formal affairs, so they wear...whatever! "One of my bridesmaids' boyfriends came to the wedding in jeans and a short-sleeve button-up that wasn't even buttoned," lightningface writes. "It was not a black-tie wedding by any means, but buy some khakis for God's sake!"
If that's not enough for you, "My wife's brother came to my wedding in a white V-neck and cargo shorts. Yup," LaPiscinaDeLaMuerte writes.
And in case that didn't make you visibly cringe, here's another one:
"A friend showed up in jeans and a basketball jersey," YoshiSparkle writes. "Not that it was a black-tie wedding or anything, but I thought it was common knowledge that jeans are explicitly NOT wedding attire unless otherwise specified (I've seen some country-themed weddings encourage jeans and boots, for instance). The weirdest thing is that he was a decent amount older than the rest of our friend group too—we were mostly 22 to 23 and he was 31 or something."
9. That time the bridesmaids flaked.
Here's pretty much what you have to do if you're a bridesmaid: Show up. It turns out two bridesmaids weren't even capable of fulfilling that (priceless!!) job. "Two of my wife's bridesmaids left after the ceremony to 'get pizza' for two hours," topper12_42 wrote. "We couldn't announce the party. [That was] three years ago; wife hasn't spoken to them since."
10. That time a guest got too drunk.
What would a wedding be without someone who doesn't know his limits? User dick_cheese (yep) said that one guest, whom he called Ed, drank a lot. In his words:
So my wife and I are literally mid-first dance and Ed's angry voice begins to get loud enough to draw attention. I look over and he is getting very riled up at one of my college roommates. After a very short time, it becomes clear that Ed believes my old roommate slept with his cousin (these two had never even come close to crossing paths so that obviously hadn't happened). And anyways, I'm thinking that's a somewhat odd thing to get mad about unless maybe she's underaged or married, but I'm not sure. But anyways it turns out, no, he is mad because HE is sleeping with his cousin and she's off-limits, at which point my old roommate punched him straight in the stomach. This sends Ed into a whirl looking for somewhere to puke (not even sure how he's this drunk, must have flashed the service or something). And in his frantic state, he toppled over, swiping my wedding cake off the table with him, puking all the while. And that's how Ed took the cake of being a sh*tty guest.
At least he has a good attitude about it: "Whatever, at least it's a good story, wish we had it on video."