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Nicia's job as a medical technician in one of the country's top hospitals renders her schedule as complicated as the Da Vinci code. In fact, Nicia's crazy work schedule usually determines our next get-together. Since we were all miraculously available the day after the slumber party, we decided to head to Galleria and then to Mylle's house for a quick visit.

What was supposed to be a quick visit turned into an impromptu inuman with my girls and their girls (read: kids). Mylle lives in the "upper east side"—Antipolo—and her married-life house has always been one of our favorite inuman venues because of the cool, crisp, and less polluted air in their area.

As the cab pulled over in front of Mylle's house, vivid memories of her wedding almost seven years ago came rushing back to me. I remember wearing this bridesmaid gown in an odd shade of lime green and getting picked up by a lesbian in the church. No kidding!

Seven years ago, our best friend Mylle tied the knot with Nette, her long-time boyfriend. We were all in our sophomore year of college back then, and our faces bore the sweet innocence that I fail to see in most kids these days.

I remember sharing the same problem with Nicia as we tried, in vain, to do justice to our bridesmaid gown made in this odd shade of lime green, until Gail arrived looking all demure and perfect in the same gown; that's when we all gave up. A thousand photos and numerous re-touch sessions later, Jed, Philip, Dustin, and Mark came to pick us up, and we all drove to this church in Taytay, Rizal for Mylle's wedding.

Mylle's wedding happened at the time of our lives when we thought of weddings as just another ho-hum event where all you need to do is sit through the whole ceremony with this blank solemn look on your face. That time, we never paid  much attention to the cheesiness and grandeur of the whole event. Clearly, we didn't pay attention to the words of love and devotion, the history of the couple getting married, the music, the details of the gowns of the whole bridal entourage, the commitment issues, and "Will I ever get married?" questions we would all go crazy over in the not-so-distant future. That time, sitting poker-faced next to Gail and Nicia, who were sporting the same blank look, all we thought about was how tight our bridesmaid gowns were.

I have always been very friendly. In fact, I was too friendly that I offered to help usher guests to their seats. Well, come to think of it, I think that's what bridesmaids do anyway. It would be another couple of years before the world would know about Barney Stinson of How I Met Your Mother, but writing about it now, a line in Article 132 of The Bro Code would have been such an irony:

"Squeezed into ugly identical dresses, bridesmaids have one goal: to get out of them. Studies have shown that a cocktail of jealousy, Bros in formal wear, and well, cocktails make a bridesmaid one of the most accessible chicks on the planet." — Article 132, The Bro Code

And that's probably what this lesbian chick in a bridesmaid gown thought when she stood beside me while we were waiting for our turn for the photo shoot. She asked me if I already had a boyfriend.

Now, straight female friends ask me this, too, but not a complete stranger-bridesmaid sporting what was probably the Justin Bieber-hairstyle of a pre-Justin Bieber time. Swearing was off-limits in the House of God and I didn't want to cause a scene and be the bad apple among Mylle's high school best friends. So I faced Justin Bieber and told her, "Yes, I have a boyfriend and that's him," pointing at Jed. He is my closest guy friend in high school who was, serendipitously, from Lourdes School of Mandaluyong. Years later, I would learn that Jed and Logan were classmates in grade school.

On my way back to the pew where my friends were, I couldn't believe that, of all places I could get picked up by a lesbian, it would be in church. Tsk tsk.

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