5 Mean-Girl Traits You Should Cop

It's a mystery. You see these great guys dating bitchy women and you think, What the hell? Why is he so into her? Turns out, take-no-crap gals who don't apologize for being in love with their fabulous selves or try too hard with men have more to offer a guy than you might think.

That may be why Sherry Argov's national bestseller Why Men Love Bitches flew off the shelves, and she followed it up with Why Men Marry Bitches: A Woman's Guide To Winning Her Man's Heart. One of the main discoveries: "Guys secretly admire women who are willing to throw out the rule book that says you have to cave to their every need to keep them happy," says Argov. "They want a woman who doesn't assume a subservient spot in the relationship--this instantly intrigues them."

Read on to learn the mean-girl traits that guys just can't resist...and why it might not be so bad if you upped your bitch quotient a little this year.

Mean-Girl Trait #1: She gives him a challenge.

Bitchy girls ooze the kind of bravado that says, "I'm so out of your league." "Nothing is more attractive to a guy than a woman who has dignity and pride in who she is and what she wants," explains Argov. "Instead of wondering to herself, Does he like me? or What does he think of me?, the bitch thinks, What's the advantage for me in having this guy around?"

Because of that aloof brand of confidence, she isn't going to spend her precious time cheerfully doting on him. In fact, she may just throw a little attitude his way. Bingo: He instantly wants to inch closer to her. "Always wanting what we can't have is part of human nature, and for single guys, it's even more magnified," says New York clinical psychologist Belisa Vranich, PsyD. "Having a woman who is difficult makes her seem like more of a conquest and, therefore, more of a prize."

The mental challenge of winning over a bitch is also incredibly appealing because men are competitive by nature, explains Argov. "Guys don't want a weak woman who is too submissive or a woman who wants a boyfriend because she doesn't feel complete without one," she says. Case in point: Angelina Jolie. She always gives off the air that she doesn't need Brad--or any man for that matter--which seemingly only makes him more attentive. "The biggest turn-on for a guy is to win the attention of a girl who is selective, and he judges that by how easily she gives herself over to him."

Bitchy Trick To Steal: "Don't make yourself available all the time; don't call constantly, respond to his e-mails immediately, or leave long, needy voice-mail messages," says Argov. Translation: Let him know that you have a very full life that doesn't revolve around him. "Leave him wanting more," says Argov. "Men equate longing with love. Longing is good."

Mean-Girl Trait #2: She's guy-like in her communication.

The mean girl might come across as abrasive in the workplace or at an airport counter, but to her guy's ears, it's the kind of talking that makes sense. She's no shrieking shrew who goes off on him (which men can't stand, by the way), but she doesn't tiptoe around the issues, which guys like because they know what they're getting.

"Sometimes it's easier for a man to deal with her than with a woman who waffles or appears to be too emotional, because the emotionally sensitive type of woman confuses him," says Argov. "The bitch knows what she likes and has an easier time expressing it. As a result, she usually gets what she wants."

Additionally, her man is able to find out exactly where he stands in the relationship. "Lets face it, some guys need the subtlety of a brick to the head," says communications expert Lorna McLaren, who teaches assertiveness skills to women in several countries. "If they can avoid the dreaded guesswork of what their women want and avoid the ultimate blame for getting it wrong in the end, huge amounts of pressure are gone right there."

Bitchy Trick To Steal: Be straightforward about what you're thinking, and don't play games or expect him to read your mind. "Speaking up for what you want can be hard for women because they don't want to sound demanding, but you have to start at the beginning of a relationship since it can be more difficult as time goes on," says Chicago-based therapist Beth Sherman, PsyD. And when you do pipe up, avoid pulling a damsel-in-distress act. "Be succinct and speak in a bottom-line way without whining or letting your voice quiver," says Argov. "When a man hears you becoming emotional, he assumes he has the upper hand."

Go to the next page to learn more bitchy tricks!

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