Posted on April 2, 2011
by Bianca Valerio, model, make-up artist, image consultant, and TV host
They say that "real love goes the distance." But does it really? Do long distance relationships work regardless of air miles or even mere provinces separating you? Both men and women have been successful at cheating while living together, so what more when they're not in the same zip code or time zone?
Rather than driving yourself nuts trying to figure out whether he's being faithful to you or not, here are some tell-tale signs we've gathered from women (who choose to remain anonymous) who've been victimized by long distance cheaters. Listen up, ladies, these clues just might save your love-lifeline!
1. All Or Nothing
Undivided or steady attention is the one thing someone gives us when they wish to earn our trust and express their interest, concern, and love. So when he starts to text and call all the time then suddenly stops (which is unusual for him)--only to start the cycle all over again, he could be dividing his attention between you and someone else. He's just keeping tabs on you to make sure you don't suspect anything.
2. Hot And Cold
It's one thing to be moody but it's another thing to be bipolar! Remaining steadfast and constant to someone we love or are interested in is something that comes naturally. Is he strangely switching his tone and choice of words from romantically sweet to easily irritable? Does he sound distant and can't stick to one topic, or show a lack of interest when you're talking? This could be a sign he's hearing you but not necessarily listening to you. Listening to someone takes commitment of mind, heart, and time. Hearing is something that just goes in and out of one's ears, instantaneously. You may have him on the phone but his mind is obviously elsewhere.
3. Ever So Secretive
Trust is the backbone of any relationship, and simple things like phone calls are made and taken so easily in the presence of one's partner. So be wary if, when you finally get to meet up and spend some quality time together, his phone suddenly rings and he utters, "Babe, I need to take this call outside…" Who knows, it may be nothing, but then again, if it's out of sync with his typical behavior, then it just might be a clue to something more suspicious going on.
4. Oh, So Vain!
If you've been dating for some time and you've become really comfortable with each other (to the point that he relaxes his gut and forgets to shave religiously), it might be a cause for concern when he suddenly makes the effort to start looking good again--especially when he's going away. Is he sporting a new hair cut? Smelling fresh, day in and day out? Did he buy a cool pair of jeans for no reason, without you? Basically, he's starting to invest in his appearance...like a second wind of fresh fasyon air.
Have you answered the questions and found yourself doubting? There is a fine line between intuition and paranoia. If your gut is telling you something, don't discount it because it just might help you unravel things about your partner.
Nobody wants to learn the painful truth, but the truth, as they say, will set you free…
Number 2 is very, very true. When my ex became hot and cold i put it down to his work and being tired and too busy to reply to my texts or call me back. but discovered by his facebook page that when he was at "work" he was actually with his current girlfriend.
April 04, 2011 at 01:45 pm report abuse