Clitoral and vaginal orgasms are hard enough to come by for many women. So you're forgiven if you're just a little bit jealous of these three ladies, who explain what it's like to orgasm from breast stimulation alone. Sometimes life is unfair.
How did you first discover you could orgasm through nipple stimulation?
Woman B: My partner was playing with my breasts far more gently than people normally would. The initial build-up was boring: his touch seemed too soft. I was about to "make helpful suggestions," then I realized I was about to orgasm. We were both shocked.
Woman C: I discovered it totally in the moment. My boyfriend at the time and I were making out in bed, and he started touching my nipples. I'll be honest, I had had a couple drinks, so I was definitely loose but not drunk. I think that helped me relax and ease into it a bit more without being skeptical. Before that moment, I would have assumed it was totally impossible for me to orgasm that way. He was touching my nipples super gently and then it just built up to an orgasm.
How old were you when this happened?
Woman A: Around 18.
Woman B: I was 22.
Woman C: I was 21.
How do your nipple orgasms compare to genital orgasms? What does it feel like?
Woman A: The two do feel different. I don't think nipple orgasms last as long as genital orgasms, and the "wave" feeling I get from genital stimulation is not as pronounced—nipple orgasms feel sharper and shorter, I suppose. However, I do feel more sensitive in my genital area when I have a nipple orgasm.
Woman B: Very similar, but with a glandular sensation in the breasts, almost like they're swollen.
Woman C: They're definitely pretty similar but when my nipples are stimulated, I feel like there's this nerve that connects straight from my breasts to my vagina. It's hard to explain!
Do you prefer it?
Woman A: Most of the time, no — generally I prefer genital stimulation. But I like the additional variety it provides!
Woman B: It's not as reliably achievable as a genital orgasm, so it's special. It's only happened for me about four times, with two different partners.
Woman C: It's a lot harder for me to come from getting my nipples stroked, so in general, I prefer it when my partner goes down on me. I feel like I'm likelier to get off that way.
How long does it take?
Woman A: I honestly don't know how long it takes, but I guess around the same time as it would take me to come from stimulating my clitoris.
Woman B: Not too long. Five minutes, maybe?
Woman C: I'd say a few minutes. If we go too long, my nipples start to get sore.
Are you more likely to come through nipple stimulation or genital stimulation? (Or something else altogether?)
Woman A: More often genital stimulation.
Woman B: Genital stimulation.
Woman C: Genital stimulation; oral sex specifically.
Why do you think that is?
Woman A: I think because I have to be very aroused before I can orgasm through nipple stimulation, so it's not usually a part of foreplay. It's also more susceptible to my general mood and energy levels, so it's not a regular part of sex for me.
Woman C: I need to be incredibly relaxed if I'm going to orgasm from nipple play; otherwise I overthink it and can't get there.
Are there particular types of stimulation that work better for you or make it more likely that you will come?
Woman A: Depending on my mood and how sensitive I'm feeling, either firm pinching or a sort of massaging of the nipple area.
Woman B: It's hard to describe. I can't make myself orgasm through stimulating my own breasts. Generally, incredibly soft touches that progress toward the nipples are most successful.
Woman C: I need incredibly light touch—almost gentle taps directly on my nipple—in order to orgasm. I don't care for licking, sucking, or biting. No thanks.
Do you find your nipples are more sensitive at certain times of the month?
Woman A: This was definitely the case when I was not on the Pill. Just before and at the start of my period, my breasts would be extremely sensitive, and orgasms from nipple stimulation were actually more intense than genital stimulation. This has faded since I began taking oral contraception and is no longer as noticeable.
Woman B: They're more sensitive when I am pre-menstrual, and I'm more likely to come then too.
Woman C: I don't think I try it often enough to pay attention to the calendar element.
How do your partner(s) feel about this ability that you have? Do they get into it too?
Woman A: It has varied. Some people have found it really exciting; others have enjoyed it simply because I enjoyed it and would otherwise not be as interested.
Woman B: They don't like the idea that an ex could make me orgasm in a way they can't.
Woman C: Mostly they love it, although honestly, I think it has confused some guys I've been with. Most guys tend to think orgasms = vagina, so they need to be an open-minded person to enjoy that ability.
Do you think it's possible to train yourself to be able to orgasm from nipple stimulation alone? How?
Woman A: I'm not sure. I would hazard a guess that it's a little like whether women can orgasm from penetration alone or not. I believe it's certainly possible to enhance your sensitivity. That being said, if you can do that, and nipple stimulation is part of a wider sex life, then how exactly the orgasms happen doesn't necessarily matter!
Woman B: I guess anything is possible! But people should enjoy their sex lives without putting pressure on themselves.
Woman C: I wouldn't stress about trying it. Just focus on orgasming by yourself so you can explain to a partner what you like.
Do you have any tips for people wanting to experiment more with nipple play?
Woman A: Have a partner who really likes breasts! I found I couldn't stimulate myself to orgasm on my own; it only happens with a partner. Just take the time to experiment and be open-minded about different types of stimulation and different sensations.
Woman B: Don't focus on whether or not an orgasm is building; just enjoy the sensations for what they are.
Woman C: Make sure you're super relaxed, whatever that means for you. Take a long bath, light a candle, whatever you need. Then just tell your partner what feels good.
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This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.