Keeping a man guessing about what's going to happen in bed is one surefire way to ensure he stays intrigued. "Sexual surprises drive up levels of the natural feel-good stimulants dopamine and norepinephrine in a man's body," says Helen Fisher, PhD, an anthropologist and research professor at Rutgers University in New Jersey and author of Why We Love: The Nature and Chemistry of Romantic Love. And, says Shannon Mullen, author of The Best You'll Ever Have, "The excitement of not knowing exactly what's coming his way adds an enjoyable new dimension to the sexual encounter."
Guys love the unexpected, but you don't want to give him a coronary either. Gauge his interest in your new sexy plan by letting him see your passion prop (ice, choco syrup, gloves, etc.) just before you use it, or simply ask him if it's okay.
With this in mind, prepare to knock his socks off (along with every other stitch of clothing) with our bowl-him-over sex tips. Once he clues in to how extremely pleasurable novel nooky can be, no doubt he'll be happy to treat you to some unpredictable bedroom bliss, too.
- Pick A Position
Write four new sex moves (consult other stories under Mattress Moves for ideas) on slips of paper and stuff them into the pockets of your jeans. When your man comes home, ask him to dig into the pocket of his choice and pull out your erotic plan for the evening.
- Layer Your Undies
Wear two pairs of panties before performing a striptease, which, according to Jennifer Axen and Leigh Phillips, authors of The Stripper's Guide to Looking Great Naked, allows you to draw out the anticipation of being in the buff by revealing your body slowly. For example, try pairing some ruffled boy shorts on top of a lacy G-string. "Let him take the top layer off, which will be more exciting when he unforeseeably finds a second pair waiting for him," says Axen. "Or wear a thong that ties at the sides beneath sheer shorts. Let him undo the ties and pull the thong off first."
To show dual sexy sides of your personality, try layering on opposites, like wearing a tempting black G-string under virginal white hipsters.
- Have No-Hands Sex
For your next steamy session, bewilder your boy by suggesting you both keep your paws to yourselves. "There will be a whole new focus on your bodies making contact with hands out of the picture," says Carol Queen, PhD, sexologist at Goodvibes.com. "Just the act of trying to initiate sexual intercourse without using your hands will be a thrilling and challenging change."
When assuming the missionary position, keep your palms planted on the bed for support and pay attention to how your bodies—particularly your pelvic regions—undulate together. Things will slow down and might even get comical—which is absolutely fine. Sex isn't always meant to be serious business. Besides that, this little exercise will remind you how amazingly good sex feels when you can use all of your digits.
- Lasso His Limbs
A little light bondage can be very exciting for guys. It turns them on, says Barbara Keesling, PhD, sex therapist and author of The Good Girl's Guide to Bad Girl Sex, when you demonstrate that you are as imaginative as you are sexually assertive.
Start with a novel prop—a belt, a pair of nylons, your bikini top. When he lies back on the bed, straddle his body and gently bind his wrists above his head (and to the headboard, if you have one). Once he's bound, it's time to play with his body.
"Use a material that feels good to the touch, like a piece of faux fur," says Keesling. "Rub it lightly down his thighs or stroke his member with a silk cami or lacy bra." This is also a great time for woman-on-top sex, which is the most stimulating for you since your clitoris gets direct contact this way. Plus, a guy will never miss a chance to see you riding high.
- Get Groomed
Whether you want to tidy up the hair down there or create a masterpiece in your pubes, shock him the next time your panties fly off. A flame? A crescent moon? A lightning bolt? Try any shape that makes you feel sexy. For DIY practitioners, here's a tip: Once you choose a shape, draw it on with white eyeliner and then trim around the pattern. Get him in on the act by first inviting him to watch, then asking him to wield the electric trimmer.
- Tweak Your Touch
He's felt the tickle of a feather and the sensation of silk on his body. Now give him a new tactile treat: leather.
Slip on some soft leather gloves and give your guy a rubdown. At first, run your palms down his torso toward his groin—but don't go there yet. Massage his legs, then work your way back to his bod. When you finally make contact with his manhood, touch lightly with both hands. "Most women just use one hand, but two gets you and him fully involved," says Keesling. Plus, the new texture will add to the experience.
- Sugar Your Lips
Your kisses are sweet already, but you can make them even sweeter by squirting a small drop of honey in your mouth before giving your guy a juicy French kiss. When you pull away, he'll hunger for more.
- Create A Chill Thrill
Using ice on nipples is a classically kinky way to wake up sensitive nerve endings, but you can give it a new twist by using ice drops. "Start with a visual clue to amp up the anticipation," says Mullen. "Hold the ice drop in your hand and bring it close to his body, but don't actually touch him just yet." Draw out the act to build his excitement, then delicately swirl the drop over his nipples. Of course, you'll be forced to follow that act up with a sexy lick.
- Put On Music To Move To
If you normally get your groove on to smooth R&B, shuffle your CD collection to alter the mood. Switch it up with heavy rock, reggae, even classical.
- Handle Him
A foot massage feels fantastic, but c'mon, he probably expects that. Amaze him by kneading his other appendage (no, not that one!): his hand. "A hand massage is fabulous foreplay," says Mullen. One sexy trick: Stroke each digit as if it were his member—the familiar sensation will get his mind racing. "When you simulate sex moves like this, he is already having intercourse with you in his head," says Mullen.
Since this kind of handling is going to get him all worked up for the main event, there's an easy way to make the transition. Conduct the massage with a warming sexual lubricant, so you can move right from the rubdown to the gettin' down without having to change products or even wash your hands.
- Nail Him
He probably enjoys seeing your well-manicured, nicely polished hands, but he'll enjoy it even more when he knows you're about to let your fingers do some walking down below. In fact, while the thought of using your fingernails (painted a vixen pink, of course) on his testicles may sound like a dangerous stunt, it's delightful when done correctly.
"Start by giving him oral sex and work your way down past his testicles to the perineum, which is the soft patch of skin between his anus and testicles, then work your way back up," says Mullen. After he's warmed up (read: rarin' to go), introduce your nails to his undercarriage. "Lightly drag your nails across them in an up-and-down motion," she says. It might feel strange to him at first, but he'll soon discover that this often-neglected body part was craving the physical contact.
- Play Hide And Sniff
Send him into olfactory overdrive with a scintillating scent. In fact, scientists have found that the nervous system is stimulated by pleasant odors—there's a direct pathway between it and the olfactory bulb—which can, in turn, increase blood flow to the penis. Scents to try: musky fragrances with woodsy overtones, cinnamon, and vanilla.
Introduce him to the arousing aroma you choose by sending him on a sexy search. Use a sleeping mask, bandana, or even his tie to shield his eyes. Says Keesling, "It takes away one of his major senses, so he has to rely on others, which heightens the element of surprise." Then dab a scent on a covert part of your body, such as your inner ankle or under your breast, and challenge him to locate it. The erotic exploration is bound to inspire lust.
- Share A Racy Rinse
When you're in the shower, wouldn't your man be pleasantly taken off guard if you suddenly pulled back the curtain so he can see you soaping up your breasts? If he wants to join you, even better, says Keesling. Slippery soap facilitates caressing, so don't be surprised if you run out of hot water before you both run out of steam.