10 Things He Thinks Right After You Orgasm From Oral Sex

'Was that an orgasm or the orgasm?'
by Frank Kobola
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1. “I NEED AIR!” 

There’s a good chance he was pinned down there with your thighs (lovingly, of course) wrapped around his head. Give the man a chance to come up and breathe.

2. “I am a god.” 

There are some things that will feel satisfying no matter how many times you do them. Cracking your knuckles, getting a popcorn kernel out of your teeth, and giving someone else an orgasm are all up there.

3. “I’m going to go fill my mouth with ice.” 

His tongue probably needs it. Or maybe hes just thirsty. Either way, hes probably headed straight to the kitchen. Shocking no one.

4. “Was that fake?” 

Categorically, its easier for women to fake an orgasm than it is for men. You shouldn’t, but you can. As such, he might have a moment of uncertainty right after the fact. Just to reiterate: Please dont do this. It only further convinces us that you love that extra-special tongue thing that only we can do (and no one else, right?).

5. “Was that an orgasm or the orgasm?” 

It’s important for him to understand when you have one of those little orgasms but you can still keep going, and when you have the orgasm that causes you to tap out for the night. Hes still working on figuring out the difference. A gentle hair tap when you want him to be done helps.

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6. “So is there...more?” 

Exactly how relaxed should I be right now? Is there sex stuff happening later? Do I mentally prepare for a blow job? THERE ARE SO MANY QUESTIONS.

7. “Give me a second. My hand fell asleep.” 

It’s likely he got his hand involved too. And to be honest, sometimes fitting both mouth and hand in a relatively confined space can be logistically problematic. But he’s willing to suffer for his art.

8. “Do you have a napkin or something?” 

Good oral is like good ribs. If he doesn’t need a wet napkin afterward, it couldn’t have been that great.

9. “If you need a minute to recover, I can just pee and then come back…” 

Probably best to take a pee break anyway. Sex is like a long car trip in that respect: Its very uncomfortable with a full bladder. As a side note: He may even try to get away with a quick number two and play it off like it was just a long pee made difficult by his erection. How sexy is that?

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10. “Let me just toss these in the laundry.” 

A true gentleman always offers to change the fluid-stained sheets for you.

Follow Frank on Twitter.

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This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.

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