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What Guys Really Think Of Your Bikini

Is that swimwear you're about to pack wet & wild, high maintenance, or WTF?

Swimsuits on a woman have always had that disarming effect on men: jaws drop to the floor, sweat starts to drip from the forehead, and wolf-whistles are held back in fear of being labeled a "manyak." And since the sweltering heat of the summer season is back with a vengeance, most will be hitting the beach to enjoy some vitamin sea sans the annoying discomfort of city clothes.

Guys might not be too opinionated when it comes to girls' swimwear (because the majority are just happy to see more skin). But to attain maximum impact from your bikini of choice, here is a handy guide to what dudes, bros, and beach bums have racing through their minds when they see you in that teeny, weeny, yellow polka dot bikini. Rule No. 1: No shorts and t-shirts allowed; it’s 2014 for chrissakes!

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