21 Things Your Jeans Say About You

Your denim is talking about you. Don't you want to know what it's saying?
by Charles Manning
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From skinny jeans to overalls, there's a style of jeans for every type out there. Read on for the ultimate breakdown of what your jeans say about you.

1. Skinny Jeans

You've got shit to do (and you're doing it). Sure, stretch skinny jeans are a little basic, but who cares? They get the job done and you are all about gettin' the damn job done.

2. Ripped Jeans

You're secretly sensitive. True ripped-jeans devotees know how delicate those little threads can be. Like you, your jeans might look tough, but are actually really fragile.

3. High Rise Jeans

You're a problem-solver. When you see a problem, you attack it head-on, whether it's conquering the dreaded muffin top, or figuring out how to hit four parties in one night without being hungover at work the next day.

4. Acid Washed Jeans

You're living in the past and loving every minute of it. Screw Taylor Swift. Kelly Kapowski forever!

5. Flared Jeans

You're ride-or-die all the way. You don't care what anyone else says. You love your flared jeans. They can pry them out of your cold, dead hands.

6. Denim Cutoffs

You're sexy and you know it. A body like yours was meant to be seen. Besides, skin goes with everything.

7. Janties

You don't give a f***. So, your ass is hanging out a little. So what?

8. Colored Jeans

You're a strong and independent woman. You know that colored jeans aren't really trendy anymore. That's part of the charm. You've found something you like and you're sticking with it.

9. Raw Denim Jeans

You're willing to make sacrifices to achieve your goals. Raw denim hurts when you first start wearing it, but you know your discomfort will have been worth it a year from now when those jeans fit you like a second skin.

10. Embellished Jeans

You own the room. Hey, you don't wear sparkles and glitter because you want to blend into the background.

11. Leather Jeans

You're the boss. Yes, those are real leather. Yes, they were expensive. And, yes, you are wearing the shit out of them.

12. Patched Jeans

You're sentimental. Whether you bought them pre-patched, or added the patches as needed, these jeans —holes and all—harken back to an earlier, dare I say simpler, time. One you can't help but feel a little nostalgic for.

13. Mini Skirt

You're girly. But without being all weird and prissy about it.

14. Denim Maxi Skirt

You're Michelle Dugger.

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15. Overalls

You're ridiculously hip.

16. Joggers

You're just chillin'. Who's stressed? Not you. You're great.

17. Culottes

You're completely fashion obsessed. Denim culottes are kind of a weird look, but that's why you like them. Fresh and fun are what fashion is all about.

18. Black Jeans

You're efficient. Jeans are comfortable and versatile. Black is slimming. Why waste time over thinking it? Next!

19. Printed Jeans

You're fearless. Hey, it takes real chutzpah to make a pair of printed jeans your go-to legwear.

20. White Jeans

You're in control. You know one stray pen mark or drop of marinara will ruin your look, but you're not worried because that never happens to you. Nothing can scare you.

21. Boyfriend Jeans

You're the coolest girl in the room. You radiate confidence like the sun radiates heat.

***

This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.

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