1. “Uy, new hair!”
And… that’s it? No compliment, just an acknowledgment that it’s… new? Don't stop there! Tell me more! Because even though I personally think this cut looks awesome on me, I’d love all the validation I can get. GIVE IT TO ME.
2. “Wow, that's drastic! You're so brave.”
Um, I just went to the salon and had a considerable number of inches chopped off my mane, and while the emotional experience was no walk in the park, I didn’t exactly go like a soldier in battle. Does it look that bad that only brave people would willingly put themselves through such an ordeal?!
3. “Sobrang sayang ng long hair mo!”
I got this cut for a reason—I was done with all that hair weighing me down. Don’t make me question my decision and become this woman storming into a salon with a sledgehammer.
4. “Now you’ll have to style your hair EVERY DAY.”
Who says I can’t make this hairstyle work with minimal effort? I can just air-dry this thing and step out and… On second thought, you’re right. Damn. *heads out to stock up on hair tools and products*
5. “You should've gotten *insert other hairstyle you clearly didn’t get*.”
Well, I didn’t. You want to grab that pair of scissors over there and get to work giving me the style you think I should have? How about gather all the miles of hair I left behind on the salon floor and magically attach them back onto my strands?
6. “You have the same haircut as *insert name of a girl you hate*.”
Holy shit, I never thought of that. I wanted to look like Kendall Jenner, and now I look like I was separated at birth from the bitch who stole my boyfriend back in college. GREAT.
7. “Heartbroken ka ba?”
While I do hope that bastard sees the hot new me and dies writhing in regret, can’t a girl get a haircut just because she wants to change up her look? But by all means, you’re welcome to quote Coco Chanel—“A woman who cuts her hair is about to change her life”—to me anytime. That’s a good one.
8. “It'll grow out.”
Sigh. Just say it looks great, and let’s leave it at that. Lie if you have to. At the rate hair grows—a half-inch per month—you and I are going to have to live with the sight of me like this for at least a few more months, after all.
9. “Mukha kang lalake.”
Ha ha. Even as a joke, this is not funny. Unless you’re saying that I look like Jared Leto, who is a beautiful specimen whatever haircut or color he has on, in which case, I’LL TAKE THAT AS A COMPLIMENT.
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