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Adele Opens Up About 'Mourning' Who She Was Before Motherhood And Experiencing Postpartum Depression

'What would I do and where would I go?'
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Adele has opened up about her experience with postpartum depression, revealing that she still "mourns" the life she had before becoming a mother. The 33-year-old singer welcomed her son, Angelo, back in 2012 and has been honest with her fans about her journey through motherhood since then.

Most recently, while speaking to The Face, Adele (whose first album in years dropped last week) took a deep dive into what she's learned being a parent and how this has changed her outlook on life.

"There are definitely a few elements of myself that I don't think I'll ever get back," she said. "More than anything, it's the freedom of being able to do whatever you want, whenever you want. Going somewhere and not having to prioritize someone else. Whereas my number one priority with everything I do since I had Angelo, which is in life, in work, is obviously my son."

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"I don't think I was ever completely selfless before I had Angelo," the "Easy On Me" singer continued. "I still have that thing where every decision I make, I think of him first. And rightly so. Some parents don't do that. I do."

As for what she thinks triggered her postpartum depression, and how she coped with it, Adele revealed she didn't feel stimulated—on top of spending a lot of time worrying about what kind of parent she'd turn out to be.

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"Giving, giving, giving, to a baby or a toddler, when they can't even f**king talk to you, your brain goes a bit mushy," she admitted. "You're not stimulated very much. In that, I also got really quite bad postpartum depression, or postnatal as we call it [in the UK]."

As well as feeling stressed about the kind of mother she'd be, Adele explained that she often still thinks about what she'd be like if she didn't have a child. "Having no time to even brush my teeth, let alone write a record or hang out with my friends," she recalled, "My friends, my hobbies, the things I like doing without a baby, are things that make me who I am. And I didn't really have access to that for a while."

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The singer first mentioned how she'd been struggling with motherhood during her Grammy's acceptance speech in 2017. "In my pregnancy and through becoming a mother, I lost a lot of myself, and I've struggled," she said as she accepted her award "I still do struggle being a mom—it's really hard. But tonight, winning this kinda feels full circle and like a bit of me has come back to myself."

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Despite her struggles, Adele admitted being a parent has gotten easier as her son has grown up, adding, "It's way easier to navigate once you can really communicate with them."

Read Adele's full interview in The Face.

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This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com/uk. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.