"Agree ba kayo sa live-in?" This was what Pia Wurtzbach and her fellow beauty queens Bianca Guidotti and Carla Lizardo asked on an episode of their podcast Between Us Queens on April 16, Friday. Joining them on the show was Ellen Adarna, who got engaged to Derek Ramsay in March.
"Yes, super, yeah," Ellen responded, revealing that she was kicked out of the house as early as 18 years old. She also talked about how she was raised by her not-so-conservative parents and how her dad suggested she live with her boyfriend at the time so she could get to know the guy better. "Kasi ‘yon talaga yung fear niya, na magpakasal kami at a very young age, so he wanted us to get to know our partner, to know what we want and what we don’t want.”
Ellen said she's gotten used to live-in relationships because this setup helps her determine if she can see a future with them. "Okay, we lived in for a month and then ma-realize ko, 'No, I don’t want to be with this guy, I cannot see a future with this guy, so why would I waste my time? Imagine getting married and, ‘Oh my god!’ It’s too late!"
"How will I get to know him?" she added. "How will I get to know the truth? Kasi it’s really different when you’re in the same house.” Ellen also talked about how every relationship is different and how living with someone helped her learn more about herself.
In 2020, Ellen battled depression and this made her realize that she had a negative pattern with her past relationships. "Before, the reason why my relationships didn’t work, akala ko sila yung problema, but it was the same pattern, so it was me, ‘cause I always had that pattern."
After doing some "inner work," Ellen realized what she had done wrong before. "When I met Derek, I was able to express it, I was better at expressing myself, and things just went very smoothly. Communicating in a healthy way."
Ellen says people should try living with someone if they haven't yet because things can go wrong and it's also for people's protection and future. "Kasi mahirap na talaga if you don’t really know the person, [especially] let’s say, if you’re going to marry him. Mag-iiba kasi talaga, e. So okay na ‘yang i-test drive mo muna bago mo piliin.”