Ever since Netflix premiered its show The Witcher last fall, it seems like the internet has had a high tolerance for fantasy shows that make absolutely no sense. In the absence of Game Of Thrones, people are desperate to fill the void. I get it. The most recent installment in that genre is Netflix's new show Cursed, which stars Katherine Langford and is a retelling of Arthurian legends. And yes, while the idea of retelling a lot of really old male-centric stories with a female lead is great in theory, the show itself leaves a little something to be desired.
I only watched the first episode (I have a life, sorry!) but here are seven questions and thoughts I had while watching that I never got the answers to.
1. Are the Game Of Thrones parallels intentional??
It only took 10 minutes for Katherine Langford's character to say, "I don't want it. I don't want to be your summoner," in a line that feels completely ripped from the Jon Snow playbook. The concept of a summoner is not really explained, for what it's worth.
2. Shouldn't there be more context given here before we just...dive right in?
I know this show is based on a comic book, but if you haven't read the comic (hi, me) it's a little confusing to just throw viewers into the middle of this plot. Where are we? When is this supposed to be taking place? What the heck is happening? The episode gives some answers to some of those questions, but not enough.
3. Why would this show even attempt to replicate the success of "Toss A Coin To Your Witcher"?
In the premiere episode, there's a moment where Arthur is singing a song in a town square. Shouldn't Netflix have learned that after the certifiable bop "Toss A Coin To Your Witcher" went semi-viral, nothing could ever top it? Don't even try, people!
4. Why are the bad people wearing all red?
I know they are the Red Paladins, but strategically cloaking yourself in head-to-toe red doesn't make a lot of sense. If you're traveling through the countryside trying to take out villages along your way, wouldn't you want to be at least somewhat incognito? There's literally no plausible deniability there.
5. Was Arthur always such a snack in the legends?
Because...he's a snack in this show.
6. Why didn't Nimue use her little powers to save the people in her village?
In the first scene, we see her nearly strangle some kid because he made her angry. Where was that energy when her whole village was on fire and everyone she loved was being killed?! It seems totally illogical to tease her being a witch and then not have her use any of her powers. Make it make sense!
7. How does literally any of this connect?
I know this is a pretty irrational complaint to have after watching just one episode of this show, but there's a lot going on here and they haven't done a great job connecting the dots. With other shows, that confusion factor would make you hit "next episode," but with this show, it doesn't feel like I'm invested in any of the people enough to care what happens to them, which is a major bummer.