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Pia Wurtzbach Says She Was A 'Yes Girl' In A Previous Relationship: 'I didn't really have a voice'

'Before this whole pageant thing, I was a very different person.'
PHOTO: INSTAGRAM/piawurtzbach
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In a recent episode of Pia Wurtzbach's Spotify podcast, Between Us Queens, the 2015 Miss Universe winner shared her "crazy breakup story." Now, we know Pia as an empowered and vocal woman who uses her platform to raise awareness about various social issuesbut that wasn't the case before she hit the pageant scene. In fact, she described herself as a "Yes Girl" who was submissive to her former boyfriend. These characteristics are a far cry from how she is with her current boyfriend Jeremy Jauncey. In a March 2020 magazine interview, Pia said she's an alpha through and through, and this relationship allows her to be just that! "I can be my full Pia, 100 percent empowered Pia, fight mode all the time. I can be the alpha that I am all the time. I don't have to filter myself for anyone anymore," she said.

How Pia was a submissive girlfriend

"So, before this whole pageant thing that I did, before Miss Universe, before Binibini, I was a very different person," she said. "Like sobrang under ako kumbaga, under ako doon sa lalaki. Yung parang kung ano yung sabihin niya, 'yon ang masusunod. Hindi ako lalaban kahit alam kong mali. I didn't really have a voice. So, I was that kind of girl. I was very submissive."

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She further described how she would choose him over everything else in her lifefrom her family and friends to her career. And this kind of dynamic, Pia said, made her lose her sense of self: "I had a relationship before where mas pinili ko 'yon kesa yung trabaho ko, kaysa yung career ko. Mas pinili ko siya kaysa hanging out with friends. Mas pinili ko siya kaysa sa spending time with family. As in parang naging mundo ko siya. And I'm sure a lot of women will be able to relate to thisna nagiging mundo natin yung tao na 'yon.

"So I gave up a lot of things. I gave up my career, I stopped doing the jobs that I was doing, which also meant I didn't have an income, so I had nothing. I also stopped hanging out with friends, especially friends that he didn't like. Alam mo 'yon, 'pag hindi siya aprub dun sa girlfriends mo, sa barkada mo, parang 'di ka na rin sasama ganyan. He kinda became, like, the boss of me, of everything. And then, pagka meron siyang hindi gusto sa mga decisions ko, siyempre [siya] ang masusunod. And I just remember feeling so lost. And, like, I didn't have a voice anymore and parang walang identity. And this is how it kinda ended."

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How Pia decided to end things with her boyfriend

It was during this time, when she made her boyfriend her world, that Pia's younger sister Sarah Wurtzbach stepped in and convinced her to leave him: "So siyempre nainis na yung kapatid ko sa akin—alam niyo naman na very vocal ang kapatid ko sa kanyanga mga opinions…So one day, she was able to actually convince me that what I was getting myself into was totally wrong. Basically siya yung gumising sa akin."

"It was one day, I just woke up and I realized I didn't want this anymore. Ganoon," she continued. Pia then mused about giving her all to a person and being left empty and finally deciding she wanted out: "I don't know how it is for other girls, maybe it's a gradual thing, pero totoo ang sinasabi nila na, 'Mahalin mo nang mahalin hangga't sa mapagod ka. Ibuhos mo na lang hanggang sa ikaw na mismo sumuko ka na.' And that's what happened to me. I gave it everything, all of my time, my efforts, my heart. And then napagod ako. One day, I just woke up and I left."

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How Pia's breakup happened

"At that time, I was staying with him. I did have my own place, but you know, that was also one of the things that I gave up," Pia shared. She went on to detail that she nowhere to go and literally next to nothing financiallyjust P100 to her nameand had to work her way up again. "I had to ask a friend if I could sleep over muna for a few weeks until I found my way, kasi wala akong pupuntahan. I just remember packing whatever I could, getting into my friend's car, and just having only P100 in my wallet. Wala akong pera. Wala akong trabaho. Wala! As in wala lahat. And I had to rebuild myself again from zero."

Pia's realizations from her "crazy breakup story"

"After that, that was a big learning experience for me, na hindi pwedeng Yes Girl tayo palagi. Alam mo 'yon? May mali din ako for sure kasi I let it happen e," she said.

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"Sometimes a crazy breakup story is a very self-destructive one. It doesn't necessarily mean na big fights, big something, but then it's just a gradual decaying of your soul…Biglang parang naubos ka na tapos na-realize mo, 'Okay, I can't do this anymore.' And you apply that lesson for the next time."

Pia closed off the topic by stressing that her journey to being an empowered woman wasn't an overnight thing and took time for it to happen: "Nagising ako, yes, sa katotohanan na ayoko na, but I was also still weak. Siyempre hindi naman parang 'yon na isang araw superwoman ka na agad, alis ka na."