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If you're always hearing your friends proudly declare that they're an extrovert (usually while wearing a tube top as a dress at 4 a.m.), or shyly and firmly state that they're an introvert (usually via texting so they don't have to see you in person), but you have no idea where you stand, here are some signs you're an ambivert—aka a person who has characteristics of an extrovert and an introvert.
1. You have no interest in going to bars every single night, but you don't think they're horrible nightmare creations where nothing good ever happens either.
Just because you reject, like, 90 percent of party invitations doesn't mean you don't go all in on that 10 percent.
2. Sometimes you can go to a party and feel like, "Damn, this is exactly what I needed!" and other times you ask yourself, "Why am I even here?!"
And the tragedy is, you never really know until you get there.
3. Every time someone meets you, they immediately ask your friends, "OK, what is that girl's deal?" the second you walk away.
Because sometimes when they see you, you're a total dick, and other times, you act like you shared a room with them for 12 years and want them to be in your wedding, and they cannot get a read on your vibe. They will learn that you are a little bit of both of those things all rolled into one.
4. If someone laughs at you when you tell them you're actually pretty introverted one more time, you're going to cry.
Just because every time they see you you're dancing on the bar doesn't mean that wasn't the one time all month you danced on a bar! They just happen to see you once a month and that is the time (mostly because it's harder to see you when you're eating cheese on the floor alone the rest of the time.)
5. You're either the first person to get to an event and make it the most fun ever, or you're the first person to let everyone know you've suddenly come down with "fever."
Basically you're someone who no one expected to show up to the party in a million years because they thought you might be dead, but they're so glad you came because everyone loves you.
6. You have no words to describe the Lion King-level of betrayal you feel when someone who told you they'd meet you for coffee suddenly wants you to come to a group brunch.
This happened to me the other day and I felt like I had to type a 10,000-word essay on why one-on-one coffee was all I could do that day and reconfiguring my brain for a group brunch full of strangers was just not going to happen without some serious tantrums in my living room that they wouldn't be able to see but would still be very real.
7. Whenever you get lonely, you're faced with the eternal dilemma of "am I lonely enough to actually leave my house or will a non-stop texting session work just as well?"
And then sometimes actually wanting to do neither one, which is why you have a cat. Hello, cat friend.
8. Every year on your birthday, you pray someone else will plan your party for you so you don't have to choose between "party where I invite everyone I've ever met because life is so beautiful and oh man, I should bake something!" or "intimate gathering with me and these new bath salts."
And if all else fails, "not even telling anyone I have a birthday at all" is a solid go-to.
9. You're basically the queen of "let's text for four hours every single night and never hang out in all of life!"
There has to be a way to communicate with someone kind of all the time and then have them know you only have the energy to see them for eight hours on one Saturday a month where you share every detail of your whole lives and then byyeeee.
10. You've literally told people you're pretty sure you're am ambivert and wanted to end the friendship when they told you that was not a thing.
Um, this list alone proves that it is.
This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.