People Are Panicking Because There's A 13th Zodiac Sign

Everything you've ever known is a lie.
PHOTO: Pixabay

NASA's (January, yet for some reason now-viral) announcement there has been an ignored 13th constellation in the zodiac all along has the internet panicking. With the addition of this constellation into the 12 ones we've always known, there is a shift in the calendar between Scorpio (Oct. 23 to Nov. 21) and Sagittarius (Nov. 22 to Dec. 21), altering people's signs. While many don't trust NASA's report, this has people questioning knowledge they've based their entires lives on: The sky is blue, the grass is green, Leos (or whatever you are that's not as good as a Leo) are inherently better than other people. 

This constellation, named Ophiuchus, NASA reports, was conveniently ignored by the Babylonians when they made their zodiac calendar more than 3,000 years ago. They'd been operating on a moon-based calendar that correlated perfectly with the 12 constellations of the zodiac, but "even then, some of the chosen 12 didn't fit neatly into their assigned slice of the pie and slopped over into the next one," so they picked Ophiuchus and left it out.

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That was all well and good for a while, but now, "the sky has shifted because Earth's axis (North Pole) doesn't point in quite the same direction. Now Mimi's August 4 birthday would mean she was born "under the sign" of Cancer (one constellation 'earlier'), not Leo." CANCER.

If you were born between November 29 and December 17, you are an Opiuchus. Your sign is a snake-holding man called also called a Serpentarius, and you are a peace-seeker who has a thirst for knowledge and secret enemies in your close circles. You're also lucky (this according to Marie Claire UK). 

The constellations are different shapes and sizes, so it's unclear how much the dates for each other sign has shifted, but, as the top of the NASA report reminds us, there's no science (at all) to astrology.

Of course there are plenty of people and outlets calling B.S. on all of this report from the National Aeronautics and Space Administration, but the general consensus is somewhere between "¯_(?)_/¯" and "screw it all to hell":

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Burn it down. Burn it all down. LEO 4 LYYYFEEEEEEE.

Follow Tess on Twitter.

This article originally appeared on Minor edits have been made by the editors.

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