Micah Sosmeña is a 22-year-old events, print, and commercial model. She believes that women should have a life of their own outside their romantic relationships. She had to learn this the hard way. And to strip herself of her insecurities, she stripped down for FHM Philippines. She has no regrets and thinks that everyone should have fun and just live a little.
When you find out your boyfriend of six years is a disloyal asshole who constantly communicates with another woman through the Internet, it can really send your self-esteem crashing into the gutter.
How did I find out? We were living together and I went through his emails–so sue me! Call me a sneak. Call me invasive. Call me a bad girlfriend. In the end, my suspicions were right. He’d been cheating on me, maybe not in the most traditional sense of the word, but sending sweet messages and planning hookups online also count as cheating in my book.
Never mind that he was always away working. Never mind that our age gap was kind of big and we were in different places in our lives–he wanted to move too fast into the future; I felt I was still too young to get married and wanted to enjoy my life.
But the trust had dissipated, and this is what led me to search for things that could fulfill me without the help of any man.
Feeling a bit down and depressed, I decided it was time to do something for myself. A lot of friends had been urging me to go into modeling, but I never really believed that I had the chops for it. Small in height and petite in frame, I was very conscious of posing in front of a camera. I was only 22, and my confidence wasn’t where it needed to be. Breaking things off with my boyfriend, however, was just the push I needed to get my modeling career going.
Lucky for me, my agent called and said that FHM was looking for someone to feature in the magazine. Even if I wasn’t the target audience, I’d always been a fan, admiring the capability of these hot ladies to take charge of their sexuality.
The timing was perfect: I was in a steamy mood, I needed a shot of self-confidence, and I wanted to show my ex exactly what he was missing out on.
The day of the shoot had arrived. I was a nervous wreck even before I stepped into the studio. This was FHM, the most popular lad-mag in the country! At the same time, thoughts of paranoia started to take over. What are my closest friends going to think? Will my family disown me? Are people going to think that I’m the type of girl who just likes to take her clothes off for fame? Is this a step in the right direction?
These were all the questions that lingered in my head. But as soon as I met the staff and crew, all my fears vanished. Everyone was professional and knew what they wanted from the experience, and this motivated me to give it my all.
I've always taken pride in being a liberated person, and this came through during the shoot. One layout saw me playing the more girl-next-door type, with long socks, a cut-up tank top, and a baseball cap helping me show off my legs (and a little side-boob, of course). Another layout had me in this strappy red number, exposing my breasts, with only some electrical tape fashioned as crosses covering my nipples.
The idea–I would later learn–was that I was portraying two polar opposites: the good gal and the vixen, a concept not far from who I am in real life.
When the issue finally came out, I was simultaneously thrilled and scared. Some people online criticized me, saying that it was mostly edited when in fact it wasn’t. The person I was worried about most was my close uncle who is a pastor. Funny thing was, my religious uncle seemed the most proud, boasting to friends and colleagues alike despite my wishes to keep it as hush-hush as possible. Surprisingly, the reception from the people I loved was the most positive, and in the end that’s all that mattered.
I’ve never had a problem with showing some skin. I’ve never had a problem talking about sex as well.
As a young woman, I feel like I should be allowed to express myself any way I choose to–as long as I’m not hurting anyone in the process.
Posing for FHM was one of the best things I ever decided to do. It has opened more doors and modeling opportunities. Since my first FHM stint in May of 2014, I’ve already come out in the magazine twice and even have a 2015 calendar cover because of it.
For the longest time, I felt like I had no identity outside of my romantic relationship. I only felt complete when my boyfriend was around. Not anymore. Now, I can say that has changed. My confidence in myself has rocketed compared to what it was when I was in a dishonest and trustless relationship. And despite how that cliché on getting even goes, I can proudly say that revenge is a dish best served hot.
Get to know Micah more by visiting www.fhm.com.ph!
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