18 Things You Understand If You Are The Competitive Friend

Nothing is ever 'just for fun.'
PHOTO: Nick Onken

1. Nothing is "just for fun" and you manage to make pretty much everything into a competition.

Seriously, EVERYTHING.

2. But it's not always about being the best—you're competitive about being the worse, too.

 As in, you want to be the shittest at something you're shit at.

3. Your friends thoroughly enjoy rubbing it in when you do eventually lose at something, and tend to not let you forget about it for a long, long time.

4. Oh, and you know the 4 levels they're ahead of you on on Candy Crush? 

Yeah, they won't let that go, either.

5. You're low-key competitive at anything that involves going head-to-head, even when you don't want to be. 

Sorry friends, it's not on purpose.

6. You trashtalk friends and family without even meaning to, and complain when they're doing the dishes "too slow" or not doing something to your standard.

 Usually you don't even mean it.


7. You're always ready to go out first. 

 Always.

8. You secretly race random people in the street or people in your building up the stairs, just as a mini win in your head.

9. You just cannot get your head around the fact some of your friends are just fine with not being good at something and don't seem to have a competitive bone in their body.

Seriously, what?

10. Your friends now know never to suggest a casual game of cards or a game of frisbee when you're around, because if you don't win?

You'll be grumpy for the rest of the day.

11. You're still haunted by the time you lost at Monopoly in grade school

GOD DAMN IT.

12. Some friends have sometimes mistaken your competitive streak for aggression.

Needless to say, you employed your best "I'm not a sore loser" face to try and put them off the scent.

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13. You can't bear the thought of "going easy" on your more sensitive friends. 

 You'd rather do absolutely nothing that involves competition than that.

14. Your oldest friends have seen your competitiveness change from extreme temper tantrums to brewing anguish on the inside. 

You're not sure which one's worse.

15. You think you've perfected your humble, chilled winner face—and then you win something and realize you're a smug ass bitch 90% of the time.

16. Most of the arguments you've had probably stem from you accusing them of cheating, which might be why...

17. You don't tend to play games with each other anymore, because you're undoubtedly gonna be grumpy if you lose and a nightmare if you win.

True story.

18. But regardless, they're still your friends just as long as the Scrabble board doesn't come out.

***

This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.co.uk. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.


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