1. You should have your own baby feelings figured out.
If you're dating a woman who doesn't want to have kids, you should know whether or not you do. If you don't, pursuing something more longterm isn't fair to either of you. The plan is simple: 1. Be a cool, reasonable human. 2. Figure out your own shit so you don't waste everyone's good time. 3. Drink two margaritas. 4. Be happy forever.
2. You won't change her mind.
Please don't try. A decision like this is not easily made, and when she says she doesn't want kids, she means it. It's insulting to everyone involved when you try to cajole or trick her into babies. Don't be a jerk. (See above simple plan to know how to behave.)
3. You're gonna do lots of super fun stuff together.
She's most likely very into spontaneous activity and you'll be taking lots of last minute road trips, surprise dates, and wacky adventures together. (And you won't have to spend money on a babysitter for any of it! Score.)
4. She probably loves to travel.
Not having kids means more freedom and more disposable income so it's easy peasy to book a last-minute flight to Japan because CebuPac is having a crazy deal. She's all about experiencing and living life and so she needs a partner who won't hesitate to hike Mount Kilimanjaro if her climbing club is planning a trip.
5. She's not a child hater.
Just because she doesn't want to shoot a watermelon out of her vagina and then raise it to become a responsible member of society doesn't meant she can't love the crap out of other kids. My nieces and nephew are the most important people to me in the world outside of my husband and this pizza. (Because PIZZA.)
6. She won't rule out dating you because you have kids.
Sometimes a woman just doesn't want to experience giving birth and being the primary (or sole) caretaker for a bebe. That doesn't mean she wouldn't love to play second fiddle to the little ones in your life. She might not want to but you should definitely ask.
7. Moving is easier for her.
She doesn't have to worry about disrupting any life but her own, and trekking across country (or to a new country!) for love is not a deal breaker.
8. Just because she doesn't have (or want) kids doesn't mean she isn't busy.
Women without children keep schedules packed with jobs they love, booked social calendars, and a million other commitments. Heck, Ladies Sans Babies (my new club; contact me about membership!) can be even busier than their breeding counterparts so don't assume someone is free and easy just because she's without bebe.
9. She still wants a serious relationship.
Just because kids don't factor into the equation, that doesn't necessarily rule out love, marriage, and everything but the baby carriage. She might still want a partner to grow ridiculously old with. <3
10. She's still a "complete" woman.
Just because she doesn't have the urge to raise a child, doesn't mean she's lacking in any way. Women without kids can still be deeply selfless, utterly empathetic, and capable of giving total and complete love and trust.
This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.