1. He doesn't schedule things like a double date with his friends without checking with you first. He never assumes you're going to be free to go to his friend's band's show or to get dinner with your parents. He knows you've got your own schedule and he respects that by running things by you.
2. He doesn't assume you're always going to do certain chores. He doesn't flip out if the trash isn't taken out or the dishes aren't washed or the bills didn't get mailed right away. Whatever your "jobs" at home are, he respects your ability to do them. More importantly, he knows that sometimes you're busy and can't get to everything you said you'd get to.
3. He checks in when he's away on business. No couple should be texting each other every 30 seconds when they're away, but he makes sure to call or text you if he's gone for a whole weekend.
4. He pitches in at home and puts in effort where it's needed. He doesn't whine about how certain responsibilities are supposed to be yours or sit around as soon as he comes home like some deadbeat sitcom character. He gets that sometimes you need help with things, and he doesn't offer up that help begrudgingly.
5. He doesn't hold favors over your head. Whether it's money you've borrowed from him or just the fact that he let you pick last week's movie, he doesn't act like you owe him later.
6. He doesn't keep secrets. He doesn't try to hide things from you, or lie about how late he was out or who he was with.
7. He doesn't throw a fit when things aren't going his way. He makes compromises because he wants to make sure you're both happy. He doesn't mind conceding either.
8. He trusts you to handle your own problems. He's there to help you when you need it, but he also knows when to back off and let you take care of things. Because he trusts your judgment and he knows you're capable.
9. He doesn't hold grudges against you. He doesn't bring up things you did five years ago, like "the time you got too drunk" any time he wants an excuse to be mad at you.
10. Your fights are about real things. You don't argue about every little thing you do. When you do fight, it's about serious things, like where you want to move.
11. You don't feel like he uses you for sex. He doesn't only come over at night, and he doesn't leave after sex. He genuinely enjoys spending time with you.
This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.