1. How hot ScarJo is. He says she is "SO sexy" and "stunning." She thinks he just likes her for the boobs and would argue, "Angelina Jolie is STUNNING, ScarJo is, well, fine."
2. The entertainment value of musicals. He thinks they are embarrassing to sit through, she thinks they are like magical Disney movies come to life.
3. The merits of makeup that has flecks of glitter in it. He hates how it sticks to his face/clothes. She loves how it sticks to his face/clothes because it's like when a cat rubs its cheek on something to mark said thing, only actually visible and sparkly.
4. Topknots/buns. He says, "I like your hair better down." She says, "I like it up and out of my face."
5. Bad romantic comedies. He says, "This makes me want to stab my eyes out." She says, "No one compares to John Lloyd and Bea."
6. Pizza for every meal. He would love nothing more, she just says "no thanks" to that much bloating.
7. Game of Thrones. His Pretty Little Liars. Her "this makes me want to stab my eyes out."
8. Sex and the City is the greatest TV show of all time. HE KNOWS NOTHING.
9. Directions. "Is that the turn? I think that's the turn." he says. "I don't know, I can't tell on Google maps, no it'sthe next one—WAIT GOD FUCKING DAMMIT THAT WAS THE TURN," she replies.
10. Whether or not it's OK to be late. He says, "I hate being late! Why do you always do this to me?" She says, "Everyone's always late, no one cares."
11. Cupcakes. He doesn't get the thrill of having one's own miniature cake. She treats cupcake shops like local landmarks that must be visited immediately upon opening.
12. The acceptable amount of money to invest in a handbag. He says, "P10,000 is insane for a clutch purse (that's a clutch, right? I used that term correctly?)." She says, "Well you spent that much on basketball tickets. Purses are more permanent than basketball games—even though it was Kobe or whatever who came here."
13. One Direction. He says, "How is this music?" She says, "THE LYRICS SPEAK TO ME."
14. Taylor Swift. He says, "She's too whiny and dramatic." She says, "You don't understand—Taylor shows real emotion in her music. You need to buy us tickets to her concert and hold my hand while she sings "Sparks Fly.""
This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.