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17 Douchey Things Guys Do That Have To Stop

Like wearing shades indoors and at night. WHY.

1. Using “gay,” “fag,” “pussy” and other gender-related words as insults. Granted, some guys who do this do it mindlessly as influenced by media or their peers. (We can take it against them for not thinking about the things they say.) But others really believe being gay or having a vagina is weak or degrading. Hello, NO. They’re being the jerks.

2. Bragging about their muscles. Do you want a gold star now? A flash? Sorry, ain’t happenin’.”

3. Bragging about how much they drank. Is this supposed to make us believe a guy is strong? If it does, what then? All that ever does is let us know someone can't hold his alcohol.

4. Bragging about how many girls they slept with. Guys who do this think that sleeping around makes them more macho. It doesn’t. And what’s with all the concern about being macho? If he’s not then he’s not; it’s all good.

5. Bragging about how many girls whose cherries they’ve popped. We’re not prizes to be won, numbers or items on a list, or something to be conquered. In fact, no person is. So bragging about that kind of shows not just how proud a guy is, but also how UNaccomplished he is. Good job.

6. Bragging about their wealth. They do this by yapping about how much they earn or how much their parents earn (which means the guys themselves AREN’T really rich). Or by spending a whole lot of unbelievably expensive stuff on you and saying he can afford those and more anyway. Let’s not forget humility is a virtue. So is simplicity.

7. Bragging about their connections and namedropping. When those connections aren’t his doing (like family), a part of me goes, “Okay, congratulations on something you didn’t do.” When those are, I want to sincerely praise his networking skills. But the bragging is just a turn-off.

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8. Humblebragging. Humblebrags are brags masked in complaints, and they are worse than bragging. They’re so insincere!

9. Wearing shades indoors and at night. Is there a good reason for this other than an eye infection?

10. Pretending like they know everything when it’s so obvious they don’t. I know some guys want to impress a girl by looking like they know everything. The thought is sweet, I suppose. But the act is really unnecessary. Also, deceiving someone is just wrong. No one wants a phoney.

11. Saying a curse word in every sentence. Nope, this is not cool at all. Cursing is inevitable in some cases, well-deserved in others, and good-hearted still in a few instances. But seriously, “Shit, let’s have breakfast tomorrow. Italianni’s now serves breakfast and it’s the fucking realest thing” makes me NOT want to share a meal with you.

12. Being glued to your phone while out on a date. The guy’s just wasting your precious time (not to mention not respecting you). You might as well just go home and watch movies on iflix.

13. Telling girls it’s a compliment when someone wants to rape her. Yup. This is a real thing and it’s CRAP. It’s like the guy assumes a girl NEEDS to be complimented to be okay, which means he thinks she’s insecure or dependent. What more, rape is a CRIME; an act of violence. It’s never meant to be a compliment.

14. Driving their big cars recklessly because they feel like they’re kings of the road. This just shows how inconsiderate he is of the people around him. What a douche.

15. Checking themselves out on every shiny surface. The self-obsession is too much, you kind of have the impression he’s making everything about him. (And he is.). Send him this song, he'll love it. 

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16. Using way too many hashtags. We’re talking about that block of unnecessary hashtags, most of which barely have anything to do with the post. Talk about spamming and desperately seeking attention.

17. Complaining about not getting what they want when they’ve been so “kind” or “good.” Nothing shows utter douchey behavior than self-entitlement. Just because a guy did something good, it doesn’t mean he gets his “reward,” like the girl he likes. Not only do their actions start to look insincere, they come off as disrespectful of other people’s choices.

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