Is he enjoying himself? Does this position make me look fat? Having these kinds of thoughts during your sack session may put you—and even him—off your game. "If you think about how you act rather than how you feel, you become an actor, rather than a lover," says Pepper Schwartz, PhD, professor of sociology at the University of Washington.
Just enjoy the moment. Focus on the feel of his touch, the look on his face, and the sensation of his body. You’ll definitely reach that big O in no time!
2. Waiting for your guy to make the first move
Don’t be shy to tell your guy when you’re in the mood for some action. You don’t have to say it straight out; try seducing him with a romantic dinner and get him going from there. Chances are he’ll get the hint and it will instantly turn him on.
If he doesn’t respond the way you want him to, don’t take it too personally. Most women fear rejection and get hurt when their guys don’t take the bait because it makes them feel unwanted. It’s hard for guys to find their mojo when they’re stressed or tired, so cut him some slack.
3. Having high expectations
Just because you can’t orgasm via penetration doesn’t mean you’re a bad lover, and neither is your man. "Most women need clitoral stimulation for orgasm," says Madeleine M. Castellanos, MD, a sex therapist and assistant professor of psychiatry at the Albert Einstein College of Medicine.
Tip: prolonging foreplay before the main event will increase your chances of climaxing.
4. Ignoring the fact that guys are visual beings
It’s great that you’re comfortable enough with your beau to lounge around in your big old t-shirt and sweats, but keep in mind that men respond most to visual stimulation. Sure, he’ll think you’re cute and all regardless, but if he sees you in sexy lingerie, he won’t be able to keep his eyes off you.
If you want him to jump on board ASAP, ditch PJs and strut around in a light camisole and girl boxer shorts.