Happily in a relationship? Great. Think you’re with The One? Even better. But if you’ve thought about the relationship not working out, how do you imagine dealing with the breakup? We all know that in breakups, one person suffers WAY more than the other. Would you be on the losing end?
1. You don’t have friends to hang out with.
If you don’t have friends to talk to about your feelings or to goof around with, it’ll be much harder for you to get back on your toes. You need people to make you happy and make you feel loved, because let’s face it, post-breakup you’re bound to be down in the dumps. No longer close with your friends because you were busy dating? It’s okay. True friends understand, and they’ll be there for you when you need them.
2. You have no hobbies or interests.
Well, in your relationship, it’s to do ~*relationship things*~ like traveling or eating together, and then some. Now that’s all okay, but you do need something that’s just for you. To have your own time and space so you know you’re not just “Rafael’s Awesome Girlfriend.” Without your own hobbies or interests post-breakup, your single life will feel empty until you have them again. Why not keep your hobbies and interests in the first place?
3. You’re not doing well at work.
When a breakup is added to your struggles in the office, it’s hard not to feel like the world is against you. It would be nice to have family or friends to see after work to cheer you up, but before that, it might be wise to channel all that anger/sadness/frustration to do your job better. Yes, your job can suck and your officemates can suck, but hey, if you do your best today, YOU won’t suck.
4. You have nothing going for you.
Some people don’t have their jobs as their top priority; they have their sidelines or passion projects—ambitions and goals outside of work. Not everyone has a sideline or is required to have one, but if #3 applies to you, you need to shape up another aspect of your life and make it stable. What’s something you’ve always wanted to do but haven’t gotten yourself into yet? Did you let a dream of yours go? Now might be a good time to start making a name for yourself. If your BF is a keeper as you think he is, he will support you.
5. You have toxic habits and you’re not willing to do what it takes to break them.
Pushing people away? Testing people to see if they’ll fight for you? Hating on the world all the time? These things set you up for unhappiness. While no one is happy after a split and wanting some space is normal, not giving yourself a chance to be happy will make you a loser. Keep in mind that we don’t choose our feelings, but we do choose some of the situations we put ourselves in. So as much as you can, choose what’s life-giving.
6. You rely on your guy for everything.
Is he your driver, your life planner, your goal-setter, your grocery purchaser? If you answered yes, you will have a really tough time fending for yourself and getting used to it. Be the main character and player of your life! Make things happen.
If this list applies to you now, know that it’s not too late to change that—not so you can be the “winner” in a breakup that might not even happen, but for you to be better person for yourself!
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