1. Decide if you even need to define the relationship in the first place.
Sometimes, when a guy's playing hard to get, you default into obsessing over and trying to define it—when, actually, you're cool staying at the MOMOL stage. So check yourself. Make sure it's something you actually care about, not just a game you're trying to win.
2. Arrange to "accidentally" run into one of his friends so you can hear how he introduces you.
Here's hoping you get a "This is my girlfriend!" rather than a "This is my…Melissa."
3. Tell him you're making him your emergency contact on a medical form and you need to know what to write on the "relationship" line.
Although I guess you could just write a giant question mark. Feels great not to put down your mom for the first time ever, doesn't it?
4. Have your hammered friend come up to him at a party and be like, "Sooooooo kayo ba?"
This isn't the most mature route, but if it's executed casually and without an apparent motive (other than your BFF's concern for your happiness), it could be the least messy route to exclusivity.
5. Ask if he wants to go to a wedding with you.
Kristen Wiig's character should have known before the events of Bridesmaids that Jon Hamm wasn't in it for the long haul—but, at the very least, she should have been tipped off when he wouldn't go to her best friend's wedding with her.
6. While casually browsing Facebook at his place, ask if you should change your relationship status.
Even if it's just taking "single" off your (and his) profile.
7. Tell him you have a work event and boyfriends are invited.
He'll either say, "That's cool, I'll just drink with the boys until you're done," or, "What do I have to wear?" And there's your answer.
8. Just ask him.
The simplest and most direct approach is the best. If you have that pit-of-your-stomach doom feeling about asking him, the chances are you already know the answer—and you should move on and find someone who wants to be with you as much as you want to be with him.
This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.