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Is There Actually A Right Way To Give A Blow Job?

Well, here’s the thing…
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One of the first sex tips I ever read from Cosmopolitan is to put on peppermint lip gloss before I went down on a guy because that cooling effect drives them wild—and I am here to tell you that the *one* time I did it, IT WORKED. So you know, you’ve come to the right place if you’re looking for tips on how to give a blow job. For one thing, we have *several* articles on the topic already: Blow job sex positions that’ll turn you on, too? Check! Thoughts women have while going down on a guy? Got that, girl. But there’s always something to be said about going back to the basics—especially if this will be your first time giving oral sex. Here’s what you need to know.

Is there a correct way to give someone a blow job?

The short answer is no. Just like everything else when it comes to sex, it’s based on a person’s preferences. For example, one of the “golden rules” of blow jobs is to keep your teeth from touching the person’s penis because it “hurts.” But in my lifetime, two men have actually said that they don’t mind it—and almost enjoy that feeling. Sure, some techniques are more popular than others but the only way to know if you’re doing it right is by listening to the receiver’s reactions. Or, you know, if you’re lucky, he could just straight up tell you when he doesn’t like what you’re doing and you switch it up from there. What you should know from the start, however, that when you’re down there, you don’t technically blow. Let me say that again: Do not blow your partner’s penis.

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Let him know you’re enjoying it.

Instead of treating this blow job as a chore, think of it as you taking care of your partner’s needs. If this is something he looks forward to—even if it’s not the easiest thing to do—pay attention to the task at hand. That build-up before an orgasm is equally important to men. Show a little enthusiasm and if it helps, you can use a bullet vibrator while you’re on your knees so you can get off, too.

Don’t just focus on his penis.

Just like when you’re receiving oral sex, chances are you probably want other parts of your body stimulated—maybe there’s a hand playing with your nipples or caressing your thighs. Guys and people with penises appreciate this, too. But there are areas around the penis that you should familiarize yourself with; there are so many nerves down there that make it extra sensitive (read: lots of hot spots). Take the perineum, for example, which is located between your partner’s scrotum and anus. You can use your tongue or a finger to apply pressure there.

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Btw, your mouth can get dry.

Yes, it’s a thing. Your mouth can dry up because you’re nervous or you’re taking medicine or you just had a cocktail. And it can get uncomfortable for him. But you can fix this quickly: Pop a stick of chewing gum in your mouth or suck on sour candy to get your mouth to water and you’re good to go.

Super important: Dont forget that you can get STDs from oral sex.

In case you forgot this piece of information: It’s entirely possible to contract sexually transmitted diseases and infections through oral sex. If you and the person you’re having sex with aren’t monogamous (meaning you’re both still seeing and hooking up with other people), it’s a good idea to wear a condom. There are several out there in different flavors, if you’re turned off by the idea of tasting latex during sex. (You know what’s a bigger turn-off, though? Herpes.)

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Not every guy orgasms from it.

So we already covered that not every person with a penis enjoys blow jobs, but even the ones who do—they don’t come every time. Knowing this beforehand can take some pressure off you because it doesn’t mean he isn’t interested or into it. More importantly, you don’t have to keep going until he does. If your jaw feels like it’s about to lock, stop. Actually, stop whenever you feel like stopping.

A last tip: Try new techniques.

Doing *one* movement the entire time can get boring. Switch your motions and let that excitement build. Every time you do this, he feels a new sensation. Run your hands along his shaft, squeeze a little (not too hard), kiss his inner thighs, and don’t forget to show his balls some love. Have fun with it, and you’ll be a pro in no time. 

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