I don't know about you, but I am legitimately terrified of testicles. No, I don't think they're gross or unsightly, I'm just beyond clueless when it comes to what to actually do with them. We know some guys' are so sensitive that it would be a huge mistake to go in there all hands-a-blazing, but if your partner has said it's ok to get the little chaps involved, what on earth are you meant to do with them?
Experts at a sex-positive website facilitating education and conversation about sex and sexuality, explain everything you need to know about pleasuring your partner's balls.
Yes, testicles, the scrotum, balls, whatever you want to call them, they are a sensitive lot. Get too rough and the entire mood will be ruined—at least for a minute. But that doesn't mean you should be scared of them either. Stroke your partner's balls. Hold them in your hand. Just the act of paying attention to the balls will likely bring your partner to the brink. Watch his reaction and listen to his guidance. He'll let you know if you can be more firm or if you need to loosen your grip. Start slow and gentle until you're more comfortable holding him, quite literally, by the balls.
Put your mouth on them.
Let's assume you're giving a blowjob. Remember, the balls deserve some tongue action too. Start nice and gentle, and always watch the teeth. Most people don't like pain anywhere near their groin, although some do enjoy a little roughness. Once you're comfortable, especially if you find that having testicles in your mouth is a turn on, gently suck one ball into your mouth. If you can, suck in the second one. (No, this doesn't just happen in porn!) The suction combined with a soft, swirling tongue on his scrotum should send him over the edge in the best way possible.
Add a cock ring.
The most basic cock ring provides a simple function—it makes him harder, more sensitive, and last longer. Rubber or silicone cock rings are designed to stretch to encompass the girth of his shaft or the base of his balls. Most guys only put the cock ring around their shaft. But if he's willing, he can pull his testicles through too—most are designed for it. Once the blood flow is restricted, he'll feel the pleasure and sensitivity in his balls, not just his penis. There are also vibrating cock rings that are designed to hit the clit during penetrative sex. But, you can turn it around so the bullet vibe rests against the testicles.
Use your vibrator.. They definitely have a place in bed with your partner, too. If you're using it to get yourself off—and you're both ok with this—offer to share. He doesn't have to use it the same way or for as long as you do, but even gentle vibrations for a short period of time can be really pleasurable for him. Vibrators can be used against the shaft of the penis and the balls. Depending on how sensitive he is—or how strong your vibrator is—he might only need a couple of minutes, but those two minutes might be mind-blowing.
Find the perineum.
You don't have to be into "butt stuff" for this one, but you'll definitely want to make sure he's ok with you heading anywhere near that area. The perineum is a patch of skin between the balls and anus that's super sensitive. If your partner is ok with it and your hand is down there showing those balls some love, stretch your fingers just a bit farther until you find it. Gently massage the area and watch his reaction. Most guys will know this is a good spot almost immediately. Keep it up long enough, and he may have one of the best orgasms of his life. Why? Because massaging the perineum is a non-penetrative way to massage the prostate, which, for a person with a penis, is as orgasmic as the G-spot and clitoris are for those of us who have vulvas.
You don't want anyone banging away at you without learning what you like, right? Well, neither does your partner—or his balls. Take your time and ask, "Is this ok?" with each new thing you try. He'll either give you an enthusiastic yes or be unable to speak from the pleasure... or he'll let you know exactly what he doesn't like. It's ok if you need to adjust your style to match what he prefers. It's what you want him to do when he touches you, right? Simply paying attention to his balls will be meaningful. Make it even better by learning exactly what works best for him.
This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com/uk. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.