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Shit People Say To Brides-To-Be

No, I'm not having 5 kids, and no, I'm not paying half a million for a dress. Are you f*cking kidding me?

He popped the question!

You must feel AMAZING.

And you're thinking...

24 hours later...

Now you need to make a gazillion decisions life never prepared you for: Who pays for what? Where will you live after? Who are the pseudo-friends you're forced to invite? Will you have a mini-moon, or a full-fledged honeymoon? Will you get that top-notch photographer your friends say you just HAVE to book?

Okay, you're officially having reruns of this:

Wedding planning can be a bitch, so cut the brides-to-be some slack. Never EVER say these things to them. Like, ever.

1. Why aren't you getting [insert name of supplier here whose fee costs an arm and a leg]?

For some reason, people assume that all couples who get engaged will drain their bank accounts and actually cease to live after the Big Day. 

2. Ay, you're not having kids? Hindi ba kayo mabo-bore?

UM, not really. We can travel on a whim, NOT worry about teenagers, and have lots of awesome sex. And maybe have loads of moolah left over for charity. Yes, that sounds FANTASTIC. 

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3. Why don't you invest in property? It's better to rent-to-own than to just rent!

Sure, why not? Will you be shouldering the P3.5 million downpayment for a shoebox condo?

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4. Will you quit your job?

Which century do you live in?!

5. Are you freaking out?

YES. I'm freaking out because you're asking me this, and I'm reminded that I should be freaking out more, but I'm not, so NOW I AM FREAKING OUT.