When it comes to sex, you might be wondering if there are tips and tricks guys want to share, but don’t. Frankly, there is no magic erogenous zone or blowjob technique to have on standby that’s going to blow his mind. Everyone is different, and what works for one guy might not work for another.
As these guys can attest, the best “tips” are just knowing how to enjoy yourself and have fun during sex.
That being said, here are 11 things guys want you to keep in mind during sex—if not just to make it better for yourself.
- “This is a pretty gender neutral sex tip, but… relax. Enjoy yourself and don’t get in your own head. Sex is fun.” —Matt, 28
- “I’ve been with men and women, and in my personal experience, guys are generally more vocal. They’re willing to ask for things more in bed. So women: don’t be afraid to make demands.” —Dave, 26
- “If you’re looking for sex tips or you’re worried about how you are in bed, enthusiasm goes a long way. In fact, I’d say, more important than being ‘good’ at sex is being into it.” —Scott, 25
- “I think you’ll have more fun if you can talk with your partner, and you’re both actively making sure you’re in an environment where you feel comfortable.” —Charles, 27
- “Don’t worry about sex tips. Just worry about being in the moment.” —Chris, 28
- “Take things slow. Even if the guy you’re with is in a rush, don’t be afraid to slow it down [for your own pleasure]. Foreplay is important. Make sure he knows that.” — Jason, 27
- “I think eye contact is very underrated but very sexy. It’s incredibly intimate to gaze into each other’s eyes during sex.” —Mike, 27
- “I think dirty talk is so hot. It doesn’t even have to be good, honestly. Just try it.” —Dan, 27
- “My ex was pretty into sex toys. Nothing too kinky or out there, but she’d get out her vibrator or something. I loved it. If you have sex toys and you think you might like bringing them into bed, I would say do it.” —Stephen, 28
- “Don’t be afraid to give explicit instructions to get you off. We want to get you off. Help us help you.” —Tom, 29
- “Just based on my personal experience, I don’t think women need to feel bad if they’re taking a while to orgasm. I don’t mind being down there between your legs.” —Seth, 27
This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.