Canceling a wedding or calling off an engagement is a huge decision to make. It's like a breakup multiplied by 1,000 because you've already started making a commitment to someone—and maybe even spent money on venues, catering, rings, etc. Blogger Katie Snooks recently appeared on Cosmopolitan relationships podcast All The Way With.. to explain what happened when she canceled her wedding a few months before the big day, and said it wasn't just hard losing thousands of pounds, it was hard changing your whole life plan.
So here are people sharing what made them decide to call off their engagements and cancel their weddings.
1. "When I came home from work after receiving news that I could potentially lose my job, understandably stressed, and when I tried to speak to him about it he flat out told me he didn't care. The joke was on him though. I kept my job and he was made redundant after we split. Karma is a sweet thing." [via]
2. "We got engaged so I moved across the country to be with him and was there for six months building a life together. One night he didn’t come home so I did some digging and found out he had a whole secret family only a few miles away. My world came crashing down. Needless to say, it was then I realized we weren’t meant to be." [via]
3. "I realized while we were planning the wedding. The open bar was more important than inviting my family. Him playing video games was more important than date night. He threw money at problems to try to make them go away. Eventually, I just didn't want to be in that house anymore." [via]
4. "I realized that I felt more lonely when he was at home than I felt when he wasn't home. I legit thought we were meant to be...we were high school sweethearts and had been together for 10 years when it all ended, with a wedding scheduled in six months from the breakup date. It was tough.
"Well... the relationship just died, I was alone, eventually found myself deeply in love with a friend, and I'm married now, living in another country and extremely happy. I think my ex and I were, indeed, meant to be: We were meant to be together for some years, grow together, and learn what we had in order to live our lives separately." [via]
5. "I realized that he only proposed because it was what you were 'supposed to do' and wasn't sure he actually loved me. It was probably for the best since we've grown to be very very different people and I'm sure we would've been divorced by now!" [via]
6. "I realized he had totally stopped trying. I had endless, tear-filled conversations with him about our issues and he never seemed to do anything to help them. He never wanted to go anywhere, or do anything fun. He didn't see the importance of doing anything for me. And when someone stops trying, it's really easy to fall out of love. I always wished that he had done something tangible to make me leave him, like cheat or lie. When you just quietly fall out of love with someone, it feels way harder to leave than it does when there's a big blow out or wrongdoing. That was years ago and I still feel guilt to this day about it. But I don't regret it at all." [via]
7. "When I didn't want to plan the wedding at all, even when the family asked about it. When he checked all the boxes but I told my mum there was still something missing. When he acted like he always knew more than me and I felt he didn't respect me as an adult and working professional. When him coming home from his work didn't add value to my day. When I knew there was more to love than [having someone to live with]. Even after years together I never felt I made the wrong choice walking away." [via]
8. "When I met someone else who showed me a preview of what real intimacy could be. I knew this person for a few months as a friend, and every time we were together we just clicked. We could talk about our past, our worries, and our future interests so easily—things I was never able to do with my fiancé. After a few weeks of realizing I was headed straight to emotional affair territory, I ended the engagement. Literally not a single regret since. And now I’m with someone I can truly see myself spending my life with!" [via]
9. "I loved him with all my heart and could imagine growing old with him, but I didn’t want to have sex with him anymore. It was the right decision to leave, as he told me years later that he realized he was never in love with me, and I’m happily married to someone else now." [via]
This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com/uk. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.