Ugh, We Still Have To Say This? Our Taxes Aren't Paying For Congressmen To Fantasize About Women

It's National Women's Month in the Philippines—a time to celebrate women's accomplishments, uplift their voices, and remind ourselves that respect is non-negotiable. And yet... here we are.

I'm exhausted just typing this. Women everywhere are exhausted hearing this. And let's be real, this isn't the first time something like this has happened, and it probably won't be the last. Not in Congress. Not in any public space. Not anywhere that women are expected to be treated with basic respect.

During a House impeachment hearing, Quezon City Rep. Bong Suntay decided it was the perfect time to talk about his "non-sexual" fantasies involving Anne Curtis.

In his own words: "Lastly, you know, once when I was in Shangri-La, I saw Anne Curtis. She is really beautiful. You know, a desire inside me welled up, I felt the heat, and I just imagined what could happen, but of course, that is only my imagination. But I think I cannot be charged for what I was able to imagine."

He defended himself, claiming there was nothing "sexual" or "immoral" about it: "There is nothing sexual in what I said, nothing immoral. It's just, I said, I imagined something. I think there is nothing wrong."

Cue collective eyeroll. Our taxes pay for this?

The committee vice chairperson, Rep. Ysabel Maria Zamora quickly moved to have his remarks stricken from the record, but that doesn't undo the cringe Rep. Suntay already made us feel. This wasn't a private thought whispered to a friend (which still wouldn't be great); this was a publicly elected official, in a formal government hearing, openly describing his fantasy about a woman for the whole nation to hear.

Rep. Suntay even tried to frame the removal of his statement as a "dangerous precedent," arguing that imagined fantasies are neither illegal nor immoral. But as the commitee chair Rep. Gerville Luistro reminded him, "We should support women by not saying these statements."

After receiving public backlash, Rep. Suntay doubled down on his statements and had the audacity to say, "Only a dirty mind can impute something which is dirty." Ah, the classic "It's not me, it's your imagination" defense, which is typically associated with gaslighting, except this time it's funded by taxpayer money.

He's been publicly called out not just by fellow officials—like Quezon City Mayor Joy Belmonte—but also by Anne's sister, actress Jasmine Curtis-Smith, proving that yes, saying gross things about women in public is still (you guessed it!) gross.

Women do not exist as entertainment for a lawmaker's—or anyone's!—imagination. And Women's Month is definitely not a backdrop for proving that a man in power can't help fantasizing about famous women in malls.

Yes, having private thoughts about someone isn't a crime. Everyone has them. But there's a difference between private imagination and public expression that causes harm. When certain conditions are met, those fantasies cross a line—and they can be damaging not just to the person being imagined, but to everyone witnessing it. By saying this out loud, you're basically telling men everywhere that objectifying women is acceptable. It's not.

And as much as you'd think this goes without saying, here's when fantasies become problematic:

When it's broadcast to others without consent

Having a private fantasy is one thing. Telling the world about it—especially in a professional or official setting—is completely different. Sharing explicit thoughts publicly takes something meant to be personal and weaponizes it, forcing others to witness it and placing them in an uncomfortable position.

When it objectifies or dehumanizes someone

A fantasy becomes harmful when it reduces a person to a body or a sexual act, erasing all the things that make them human—their accomplishments, dignity, and agency. It turns a living, breathing human being into a mental playground for someone else's entertainment.

When it creates a hostile environment

Comments like this, made in workplaces or official spaces, can make people feel unsafe, intimidated, or unwelcome. They signal that certain people's bodies and identities are fair game for commentary, which is the exact opposite of professional conduct and respect.

This isn't a checklist for harassment. It's not an exhaustive list of what needs to be "completed" before something is deemed offensive. But it does illustrate why publicizing intimate thoughts about someone else—especially in a government space—is never harmless.

Rep. Suntay openly fantasized about a woman he doesn't know, in front of colleagues, in an official (!) government space—and then dismissed concerns about it. In doing so, he became the "dangerous precedent" he had warned about, showing exactly how not to speak in Congress.

The takeaway is simple: elected officials must separate personal desires from public duty. Imagining someone is one thing—broadcasting it in Congress is another. It's disrespectful, it's unacceptable, and respect isn't optional, especially for people entrusted with making laws.

So here's a reminder to Rep. Suntay—and anyone else tempted to follow his lead: Happy Women's Month! Keep your fantasies to yourself, do your job, and respect women. Really, it's that simple.

Thanks for showing us why Women's Month still matters. We're exhausted from the same old bullshit—but make no mistake: we'll keep calling it out. Every single time.