Look, we all know someone who’s way too extra about their pregnancy. But no one is more extra about baby-making than the royal family, who have all KINDS of wild rules in place around the birthing of new BBs. Like, did you know royal moms don’t have baby showers? The reason why lies ahead, friends.
The Queen finds out about the birth before anyone else
Protocol dictates that Her Majesty the Queen finds out about royal births before anyone else — even the newborn's grandparents. Apparently when Prince George was born, Prince William called Elizabeth II on an encrypted phone to tell her the good news.
But don't worry, they didn't forget about Kate's family of normals. Per Vanity Fair, "Then there were calls to Kate’s parents in Bucklebury, her sister and brother, Prince Charles and Camilla, and Prince Harry, all of whom were relieved and elated in equal measure."
Royal midwives are *always* involved
Royal moms might give birth in hospitals these days (the Lindo Wing is a particular fave), but they're still wildly obsessed with midwives — even when doctors, nurses, and a special royal gyno are on hand.
It's traditional for members of the family to have midwives by their side for labor and delivery (Kate had three!), and apparently they're sworn to secrecy.
Here's Princess Anne leaving the Lindo Wing with her son Peter, flanked by a veritable army of people who helped out during the big moment. FYI, Anne set the royal trend of giving birth at the Lindo Wing, and was followed by Diana and Kate.
Royals "debut" their baby right after birth
Poor KMid has had to get into full hair, makeup, and heels mere hours after pushing a literal human out of her body—THRICE. (In fact, one of the first indicators that she had given birth to Prince George back in 2013 was when her hairdresser was spotted sneaking into the Lindo Wing.)
Here's Sarah Ferguson debuting Baby Beatrice! Wow, her hair is SOMETHING else. Bow in the presence of greatness.
And Princess Diana Debuting Baby Harry! Wait, Diana's hair is even better. Keep in mind she literally just gave birth!
Royal moms don't have baby showers
Despite reports that Kate's sister Pippa Middleton threw her a baby shower before Prince George's birth, royal experts say that was most likely fake news.
First of all, baby showers aren't as much of a ~thing~ in England, and royal expert Victoria Arbiter explains that, considering the royals are "very wealthy... a lavish baby shower would be seen as highly inappropriate." Of course, this doesn't mean Kate's closest friends didn't give her gifts! Royal babies go through diapers just as fast as regular babies, after all. There just wasn't an official party or anything, OK?!
There's a 62 Gun Salute from the Tower of London when a royal gives birth.
Was there a gun salute after your birth? Didn't think so. But when a royal baby is born, 62 guns go off from the Tower of London. Gun salutes are actually pretty common across the pond — they're fired on important dates throughout the year, including the Queen's birthday.
The baby's gender typically doesn't get revealed in advance
The world didn't find out the sex of Kate Middleton's babies until their births were announced — and it's possible the royal parents didn't either! Wills and KMid reportedly didn't even know the gender of baby #3 before he was born.
Sure, this could have simply been their preference, but it's standard that the public is typically left in the dark.
All Royal Babies wear the same Christening gown
Does this gown look familiar? It should, because literally all royal babies wear it. The massive lace tablecloth of a dress is a replica of a christening gown from 1841, which was used at the christening of Queen Victoria’s eldest child.
Prince Charles and Prince William wore the original gown before it was preserved in the royal archives, and now royal babies wear a replica made in 2008.
Here's Baby Charles Rocking the OG Look in 1948! Pictured here with his grandmother, the Queen Mother, who knew that cherubic baby boy would grow up to cause so much DRAMA?
And William Workin' It in 1982! Although, we can all agree that Diana's hat was workin' it even harder.
Royal parents get maternity leave
Technically, being royal is a "job" (LOL, okay), which means members of the family get time off after they have kids. Kate is currently on maternity leave having recently give birth to Prince Louis, which ABC News reports will last about six months—a fairly standard length for moms in the UK.
Meanwhile, Prince William took two weeks off after the birth of Prince George and Princess Charlotte, but opted out of leave after Prince Louis' birth because so many other members of the royal family were also out of commission for various reasons, and frankly SOMEONE had to step up.
An official announcement is always posted after a royal birth
One old school habit the royal family can't seem to break? Framing an extremely ornate royal birth announcement and sticking it on an easel outside Buckingham Palace for everyone to stare at.
In ~modern times~ royal births have also been announced via social media, though. After Louis' birth, for example, Kensington Palace tweeted that, "Her Royal Highness The Duchess of Cambridge was safely delivered of a son at 1101 hrs. The baby weighs 8lbs 7oz. The Duke of Cambridge was present for the birth. Her Royal Highness and her child are both doing well."
Nowadays, Royals share official portraits of their babies
The royals haven't published an official rule book about their baby dos and don'ts, but recent history tells us that an official photo of the new HRH is absolutely standard. Here's the adorable photo of Prince Louis that Kate and William shared shortly after his birth.
And Here's Baby Charlotte! Can you believe how much these two have grown up? ME NEITHER, glad we all agree.
And Here's Baby George! Technically George's birth happened before the royals made their Insta game official, but so that he doesn't feel left out, here's the first official portrait of the bb Prince released by Kensington Palace.
These days, Royal Moms are encouraged to breastfeed
Keep in mind that the royals are a family that relied on wet nurses (lactating women who stepped in during feedings) for generations, but nowadays they're encouraged to breastfeed their children thanks to The Queen.
According to The Guardian, "Royal breastfeeding mothers are a relatively new phenomenon. The present Queen, Elizabeth II, was breastfed following her birth in 1926 and chose to continue the practice with her own children."
Royal Babies get a special blanket
Have you noticed that Prince Louis, Princess Charlotte, and Prince George's baby blankets all look identical to the ones Princess Diana wrapped Prince William in? It's because they basically are.
The royals use special knitted-lace shawls from GH Hurt & Son Ltd.
According to the Daily Mail, "GH Hurt & Son Ltd, which has a long-standing connection with the Royal Family, sent the couple one of their £45 merino christening shawls. It was identical to one William had when he was a baby."
Here's Prince William in his shawl. Memories! And Diana, rocking her signature "I just pushed out a baby, LOL" hair.
Royal babies always have names with special meaning
You aren't going to find members of the royal family sporting names like Brooklyn or Apple. The royals pick traditional monikers from their own family tree — duh! For example, Prince Louis is speculated to be named after Prince Philip's uncle Louis Mountbatten.
Meanwhile, Prince George is said to be named after Queen Elizabeth's father, King George VI, and Princess Charlotte is believed to be named after Prince Charles!
Immediate family aren't always godparents
This side of the pond it's pretty traditional for siblings to be named godparents. So, wondering why Harry isn't godfather to one of his cute nephews or niece? Because he's immediate family! The royals like to spread the wealth, metaphorically, and give out those ceremonial godparent patronages to, you know, other noble folks and/or close friends.
At the time of Prince George's christening, royal correspondent Robert Jobson explained that due to being an immediate relative, Harry "will have a role in George's life anyway."
That said, some distant family members are in the royal godparent squad — including Laura Fellowes (Princess Diana's niece), Adam Middleton (Kate's cousin), and Zara Tindall (William's cousin).
This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.