Bianca Umali Became Independent At 16—Here's How She Learned To Be Alone Without Feeling Lonely

Bianca Umali is entering a new chapter of self-expression, and she's doing it through her newly launched podcast, Simply, B.

In the first few episodes, Bianca takes listeners behind the scenes of her life and opens up about the experiences that shaped her into who she is today. Among the most personal topics she discussed in "Mag-isa Nga Ba Ako?" released on August 8, was her relationship with independence and how, for years, she mistook being alone for being lonely.

Looking back, Bianca shared how losing both of her parents at a young age pushed her to grow up much earlier than most people.

"When I lost my mom at five [years old], and when I lost my dad at ten [years old], and since then, I stayed with my lola, and my lola has raised me," she recalled.

And as grateful as she was for her grandmother, Bianca said she eventually felt the need to learn how to stand on her own. At 16, she made the decision to live independently, partly because she wanted to help ease her grandmother's responsibilities as she got older.

Now 26, Bianca has had a decade to reflect on what it meant to grow up so independently—and how that experience shaped the way she sees being alone today.

"To make decisions and face challenges on my own and not [have] someone to guide me was actually very hard," she shared, adding that she had to figure out many things by herself growing up. "I really didn't have anyone also to explain to me what my situation in life was."

Over time, Bianca became so used to relying only on herself that she didn't realize the independence she had built had also become a barrier. "Yung strength that I have to survive independently has also become a wall, at hindi ko nakita yun. Ngayon na lang ako naging aware dun. Ngayon na tumanda na ako," she said.

From there, things started to spiral. Bianca said she began shutting people out, which only made her feel more alone and lonely. At one point, she even struggled to recognize herself.

"I didn't know who I was looking [at the] mirror. I really used to feel like hindi ko gusto yung nakikita ko. Grabe ko i-bash yung sarili ko sa salamin. Like, ang laki ng mata mo, ang liit mo, siguro pangit talaga yung ugali mo. I would be so harsh to myself," she shared.

But Bianca eventually found her way through it. She started with small but meaningful steps, like speaking more kindly to herself and practicing daily affirmations.

Over time, she also built healthier routines that helped quiet the overthinking and negativity. She turned to journaling and surrounded herself with people who genuinely supported her growth.

"When I chose to dwell deeply into my faith and when I met the right people…when my relationship with Ruru [Madrid] blossomed further, when I was able to meet the right people also like our mentor Sir Jay Cruz, who has also guided me on how to holistically approach life in connection to the things that I do, I really have started seeing myself as a planted seed," she shared.

Through that journey, Bianca developed a stronger sense of self-love and became more comfortable embracing who she is. She learned that being an introvert wasn't something she needed to change, and that enjoying her own company didn't automatically mean being lonely.

These days, Bianca finds joy in the simple things: staying at home, doing chores, running errands, reading, and spending time with the people she loves most. "My definition of having fun is really staying inside the house and cleaning and reading and eating and resting," she said. "That is what being alone is to me and as a matter of fact, that is what joy is to me."

At this point, Bianca knows that enjoying her own company doesn't mean she has to do everything alone. And after three years in the making, her podcast Simply B is finally giving her another space to share that side of herself.