Rough sex is like jumping into a pool of freezing cold spring water. Either you're expecting it and it's amazing even if it's a little physically jarring. Or you're not expecting it and it's refreshing even though at first it's frightening.
1. "Please be careful, I have to meet my family in an hour."
This is a legitimate concern. As hot as rough sex is, it can you leave you looking like you were just mugged by a wolverine. It's one thing to have to go see your family knowing you smell like sex sweat. It's another to have to find an explanation for why your shirt is ripped and you're covered in scratches. Your parents aren't dumb, they can put two and two together. Unless you tell them "Oh, I fell into some bushes and also apparently someone had come on them." But that's one of those excuses you can only get away with using once.
2. "Wait, what's going on?"
For some, rough sex can be a brand-new experience. Go easy on them.
3. "This is amazing."
For some people, rough sex is their bread and butter, and any other kind of sex is just straight boring. It's like rough sex is pizza, and regular sex is cheap-ass pizza. They're not even going to stand for that shit.
4. "I did not expect this."
Sometimes, you can look at a person and you can just tell they're into some kinky shit. You shouldn't judge a book by its cover, sure, but sometimes the cover is enough to let you know they love real weird stuff. Other times, rough sex like that comes out of left field from someone you'd never expect. For some dudes, that's the best kind of rough sex.
5. "You can go ... harder."
Maybe what you think is rough sex isn't really that rough. That doesn't mean you need to step you game up or do anything that makes you uncomfortable. But he might just mean it as a challenge. Just how crazy can the two of you get?
6. "Ow. OW!"
Sometimes, when the sex gets really rough, there's a fine line between hot, angry sex and pain. Ideally, if the two of you are doing this in the first place, you like a little bit of both.
7. "OK, that's where I draw the line."
Everyone has their limit. Maybe you're way rougher than he is. And just because he was into getting scratched until you drew blood does not mean he's going to love getting bit. Everyone has their boundaries, even if they don't make sense to you.
8. "This is going to break my dick... and I don't even think I care."
If you want to make a sex omelette, you've got to break a couple of dicks. That's a real saying people crochet onto throw pillows.
9. "I can't tell if you're coming or yelling at me."
Maybe even both? Are you yelling because you aren't coming or because you're about to come? My eardrums burst when you shoved me into the headboard over and over 20 minutes ago.
10."That is going to give me PTSD."
But like, sexy PTSD.
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This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.