Demi Lovato recently celebrated her sixth year of being sober and opened up about her struggle with abuse and depression during an interview with Dr. Phil—revealing that she contemplated suicide as a young child.
"The very first time that I was suicidal was when I was seven, and I had this fascination with death," the singer said. "I have experienced things that I've not talked about and that I don't know if I ever will talk about. But at seven, I knew that if I were to take my own life that the pain would end."
Demi said her suicidal thoughts returned when she was being bullied, and as she struggled to cope with her ongoing depression: "It came back when I was bullied. It came back several times when I was struggling with depression—my bipolar disorder. I turned to cutting and there was a while there when my mom was afraid to wake me up in the mornings, because she didn't know if she opened the door, if I would be alive or not, because every time I cut it got deeper and deeper."
"Reach out to people," she continued. "Don’t hold it inside—don't isolate. Reach out to people, whether it's close friends, family. If you feel like you don't have anybody, look within yourself and try to find that resilience that will ultimately get you through whatever it is you're going through. Every single person on this planet is worth life."
The singer opened up to concert goers at a Brooklyn concert on Friday (her sober anniversary), saying, "Yesterday was a really big day for me. Yesterday, six years ago, I was drinking vodka out of a Sprite bottle at nine in the morning, throwing up in the car, and I just remember thinking, 'This is no longer cute. This is no longer fun. And I'm just like my dad. So I took a look at my life and I said, 'Something has to change, I've got to get sober.' So I did."
This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.