11 Things I Learned Not To Assume In My 20s

"I've worked really hard for this and I deserve it." NOPE.

1. You can judge a woman by her expensive leggings. 
Just because someone walks around with her sosyal workout clothes and her why-would-anyone-buy-something-that-ridiculous-at-this-age designer handbag does not mean she's coming home to a penthouse apartment she lives in by herself. Sure, it's possible mommy and daddy dearest are bankrolling her, but it's also possible she's terrible with her entry-level money and insecure about what other people think.

2. Looking healthy = feeling healthy. 
I'm not going to make jokes because this one hits home for me. I look "normal" and I function "normally," but I have Crohn's disease and it makes a lot of things about me not "normal." If nothing else though, Crohn's has given me perspective: Everyone (E.V.E.R.Y.O.N.E.) has her shit. Mine is just constant :).  

3. You are the only one your age panicking about why your boss killed you today. 
Though you hear all the time how cool Anna and Jenny's bosses are and what badass things they get to do for work, they too are coming home at the end of some days wondering if marketing is just not for them. They too are calling their moms overanalyzing sassy emails they've received, and wondering if they should drop everything and go back to school after all.

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4. Everyone's having a #SundayFunday without you and it's amazing. 
Though your FOMO may spike on Sundays when you've spent the evening before Netflix and solo-chilling, remember about half your friends did the same. 

5. All #squads are as perfect as they seem. 
Think about how many people you actually like and be honest. You like about six people, not including your parents, don't you? Twentysomethings don't have the energy to like more than eight people max…meaning anyone in a #squad bigger than that has a few real friends and is bound to four other people they don't really like that much. #Squads are for Taylors and old people who enjoy mall-walking.

6. Your mom is Superwoman. 
She's not—and that's a good thing. You spend so much of your life assuming she has all the answers and is solid AF, but when you get old enough that she becomes your mom/friend, you realize she's been dumped, broke, unemployed, exhausted, and sad at times you had no idea she was struggling…kind of like you.

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7. "I've worked really hard for this and I deserve it." 
Don't be that Millennial! Do not walk into a job interview or a meeting with your boss thinking you deserve anything. Did you work hard? Sure. Do you deserve a raise for that reason? No way, bro. And when you start feeling that way, read this. It always knocks me down a few pegs in a good way. 

8. If you saw Joan wearing (expensive) sneakers, you should buy expensive sneakers too. 
Firstly, Joan might look great in those designer kicks, but you'd both probably look just as great in the department store version. Expensive things are not always nice things...and most trends are not meant for everybody, for that matter.

9. BFFs are for EVAAAAH. 
Another thing you realize the farther you get away from school: FaceTime is a blessing, but it's not a real substitute for face time. People you love move away and you are busy. There comes a point in time where you realize if you don't decide to make friendships a priority, they will begin to drop off slowly. 

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10. Of course you'll meet your Person in your 20s! Of course you will! Ha! Ha ha! 
Not everyone meets their People in this decade. Does that make you any less of a well-rounded, emotionally stable Grown-Ass Woman? Of course it doesn't. Your Person will come when he or she is meant to. 

11. You won't feel happy, free, confused, and lonely in the best way as soon as your 20s are over. 
There's a lot of hype about these being the "best years" of our lives, isn't there? You're telling me our 30s aren't going to be as great? That just isn't true. (Well, I'm not quite there yet. But I assume.)


This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.comMinor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.

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