1. Your friends expect you to stand up for them, even when it has nothing to do with you. Yeah, you're happy to send your own burrito back when they forget the two dollars of guacamole you paid for, but now you've got to enforce Sally's burrito too? Girl, come on. Flag your own damn waiter down! I'm just trying to eat lunch.
2. You're always honest. Sometimes that's a good thing, and sometimes it's not the best thing. But everyone knows what you're serving when they come over for tea.
3. Your friends know you always have their backs. You're not friends with people you just kinda like (and you will drop a toxic person like that) so if you're buddies with someone, you're all in. If someone is lucky enough to make it into your inner sanctum, you're the ultimate ride or die.
4. You're the one who will (at least try to) stop your friend from making major life mistakes. If she asks, that is. You're not a monster who will stand up in the middle of a wedding and yell "object!", but you'll at least let your friend know, honestly, if she asks, how she's about to jump off a cliff into shark-infested waters and you'll ask her not to do this but if she chooses to, you will be by her side the whole time. What? You're the ultimate shark tamer.
5. People are always coming to you for advice but you don't even get paid. People always ask help from you. ALWAYS!
6. You have to tell your friend when her outfit is cray. Listen, you're not a bitch, you just want her to look her flyest. So when Suzie comes out wearing tan pants and a blue shirt, you need to be the one to tell her she looks like a Best Buy employee. If not you, then who?? That's basically your motto.
7. You always have to be the one to stick up for your friends around loser dudes. People can say what you will about Regina George being a hellhound (and she is!) but when she tells Gretchen's no-good ex, Jason, to get lost, you are totally team Queen Bee. Whether it means telling the skeevy dudes at bars to take a hike or taking your friend's phone and texting her ex to play with his own ding dong, you get the dirty dude shit done.
8. You're often the bearer of bad news/the truth. You told people One Direction was splitting up even before they wanted to hear it. It was just so obvious! It's not your fault everyone wants to live in a default state of perpetual denial of reality. You have no time to live the lie, even if it involves Harry's perfect ponytail. Sigh.
9. Everyone thinks you're a bitch. But you're not! Swear to god! You love fiercely than most, you dance like no one's watching, and you tell the truth like tomorrow is not a guarantee (that's why today is called a present!). You've just got to be you! (And, yes, let's be honest...you're also a little bit of a b-word.) (Just a teeny tiny bit? Just being real here. Isn't that why you love me?)
10. You will call someone out if they're being rude, mean, etc. You're not mean, you're blunt. Two different things. And you have no time for bullies, jerks, or any combination of the two. Shut. It. Down.
11. You'll never try to impress a guy by pretending to be into some indie band. "Sorry, but I don't care about Chvrches. How the eff are you supposed to pronounce that anyway?! CHUVURCHES?? Ano ba."
This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.