7 Reasons Why A Threesome With Your Boyfriend Would Never Work

Someone's bound to have bitch-fit post-coitus.

1. One of you is bound to get jelly! Whether there are two girls or it’s a devil’s threesome (two guys, one girl, get it?), there’s no way that there would be an equal distribution of attention. Someone’s going to have bitch-fit post-coitus.

2. Are you ready to swap spit with another female? Fondle her breasts? Lick her all over? Play with her hoo-ha? Didn’t think so. Or on the flipside…

3. Can you really handle two penises? Your mouth and hands are going to be soooooooo tired after. Let’s not even talk about the soreness you’ll experience from your other orifices.

4. That person you let into your bedroom might start blabbing. Then, all your sexual secrets you’ve kept behind closed doors would be out in the open. Nooooooooooooo!

5. There’ll be a lot of weird farting sounds. Also, expect loads of unwanted sweat. And limbs and flesh everywhere. And the result would be…

6. Your sheets will look (and smell) like they’ve gone to war. A sex war of epic proportions! Semen, sweat, saliva–basically every kind of love juice you can think of will have stained your lovely 300 thread count Egyptian covers.

7. It could possibly break up the relationship. Uhm, you can barely stand it when he checks out other girls in public, what makes you think him kissing–let alone boning–another woman in front of you would be sexy?


Sorry, no results were found for