Without being angry, ask him why. If he says he's uneasy around your clan, offer to stick by his side at the next function, so he doesn't feel awkward.
If you spend a lot of time with family--more than he'd ever want to--compromise by asking him to show up only at major events.
"Remind him that it's important to you that he makes the effort, but try not to be too demanding," says Seth Meyers, PhD, clinical psychologist in Los Angeles.
