With every breakup that leaves you feeling generally underappreciated, part of the healing process might involve doing a thing or two to gently remind your ex that, um hello, you are the shit. If you're out doing things that genuinely make you happy, what’s the harm in showing off just a little to that ex who broke up with you with an emoji?
1. Taking selfies of your inevitable post-breakup haircut.
This hair transformation is an exciting time for you. When you finally get that pixie/undercut/neon-rainbow ombré (or all three at once as a huge “fuck you” to your ex who “hates short hair on girls”), you’ll naturally have to document it. Your Instagram will become a small shrine to your beauty à la sunlit selfies that say, “Yeah, you sure you don’t miss this, bro?” (He does.)
2. Posting your sexiest #TBTs.
That Halloween throwback from when you committed to a full-body pleather Cat Woman suit is potent when it comes to baiting an ex (or all of them). Thanks to old beach pics and that one moody photo shoot your friend with a Canon 5D did three years ago, you are constantly reminding yourself that you were always fucking hot. And, you know, every single person you’ve dated who still lurks on your profile.
3. Taking ~mysterious~ brunch pics.
You’re grabbing breakfast tacos with your best friend, but your ex who still follows you on Instagram doesn’t have to know that. A true best friend will forgive you for cropping them out and leaving the owner of that plate across from you up to the (hopefully very jealous) imagination.
4. Snapping a pic with everyone you hang out with.
Normally, you’re shy about drunkenly whipping out your phone and yelling, “Let’s take a piiiiiiiiiic,” but when you’ve got an ex you wanna show off your #goals single life to, you have all the motivation you need. Every day is a #squad day, flaunting the fact that you are anything but alone.
5. Posing with a very attractive and very platonic friend.
Your friend Mark is truly, truly just a friend, but your ex probably thinks the Jamie Dornan-look alike in your Snap Story is 100 percent a new fling. And of course, the fact that you added heart emojis and a caption that says, “He’s the best” doesn’t help at all in the clarification. To your yesterbae, you and Mark are already engaged.
6. Looking extra hot when you know you’ll see them.
The law of nature is that when you’re rocking five-day hair and a ketchup-stained jacket is precisely when you’ll bump into your ex. For all the other times, like when you both RSVP to the same birthday, you have an opportunity to compensate. Let’s face it, you’d never commit to wearing an incredible low-back sheer bodysuit in February unless your ex sees it. Thank them for half of your most ambitious wardrobe choices.
7. Making an extra effort to talk to new people, especially dateable ones.
Being in a steady relationship made you admittedly a little less willing to work through stilted small talk, but when your ex is casually glancing at you from across the room, you’re suddenly very chatty. Miraculously, your self-professed social awkwardness feels nonexistent and you’ve just left with a few phone numbers (and a date.)
8. Posting pics of hot celebs.
Even though you have no way of actually dating Chris Hemsworth (because he’s happily married), seeing you dedicate a #MCM to his Thor workout just reinforces the fact that your thirst for men who are not your ex is very, very alive.
9. Squeezing the word “date” in anywhere you can.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you’re moving on and meeting new people—doesn’t mean you can’t milk that a little and post a clearly labeled pre-first date Snap.
10. Telling all your mutual friends how great you’re doing.
Nothing makes a fuckboy feel a pang of envy like hearing that you’re not only OK, you’re the best you’ve been in a while. You sit a little taller than usual and try not to brag too much about the half-marathon you just ran and how, oof, you gotta go, you’re meeting a Parisian actor/model tonight for drinks and, you know, other stuff, wink wink. He doesn’t need to know what only your closest friends do: that you still sometimes fall asleep in a small ice cream puddle while watching Netflix.
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This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.