Meghan Markle has revealed for the first time that she suffered a miscarriage earlier this year. Writing bravely in a very moving essay shared in the New York Times, titled The Losses We Share, the Duchess of Sussex described in painful detail the moment she and her husband Prince Harry lost their unborn second child.
One morning in July this year—a day that "began as ordinarily as any other day"—Meghan described going about her typical routine. "After changing [Archie's] diaper, I felt a sharp cramp. I dropped to the floor with him in my arms, humming a lullaby to keep us both calm, the cheerful tune a stark contrast to my sense that something was not right," the royal wrote.
"I knew, as I clutched my firstborn child, that I was losing my second."
The couple quickly went to hospital, where it was confirmed their child had passed away in the womb. "I lay in a hospital bed, holding my husband’s hand. I felt the clamminess of his palm and kissed his knuckles, wet from both our tears. Staring at the cold white walls, my eyes glazed over. I tried to imagine how we’d heal," she candidly shared.
Meghan Markle's difficult revelation wasn't just shared to start a conversation about baby loss, something which, very powerfully, has been discussed more publicly of late. The Duchess also used her painful experience as a way to communicate a unifying message: "The only way to begin to heal is to first ask, 'Are you OK?'"
In challenging and divisive times—as the whole world over has suffered this year as a result of both the coronavirus pandemic and the urgency of the Black Lives Matter movement—Meghan poignantly suggests we need to start with something as simple as opening up a caring conversation.
"Where moments sad, scary or sacrosanct are all lived out alone. There is no one stopping to ask, 'Are you OK?'," the Duchess wrote.
Reverting back to her own personal pain, Meghan Markle described losing a child as "carrying an almost unbearable grief, experienced by many but talked about by few."
She ponders whether perhaps opening up that conversation—and so many others—is the key to rebuilding ourselves in times of suffering. It's an important, thought-provoking message, and one that's only elevated by the power of her own pain.
This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com/uk. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.