1. "Yeah, but you can get away without wearing a bra." This just implies our boobs are so small, they aren't visible with the naked eye.
2. "You're so lucky." We don't feel all that lucky when all we really want in life is cleavage so we can pull off that sexy dress.
3. "How is your bikini still wet?" Padding, okay? Now can we just quietly ignore the small rivers of water slowly pouring from each boob and move the conversation on?
4. "You can wear anything." HA! You're funny... Try telling that to any girl who has tried on a dress, only to find enough room in the bust to store two mice.
5. "I wish I could give you some of mine." Um, thanks? But I'm kind of good with my own thanks and if we're making wishes, I'd rather divert some of the fat from my ass up there TBH.
6. "Bikini shopping is such a nightmare when you've got big boobs." Oh really? Because it's so easy when you've tried on eight triangle tops, each of which make your boobs look progressively flatter and more nonexistent.
7. "Real women have curves." Women without curves aren't all buff supermodels, you know. We're still real people with hang-ups. You know, hang-ups like the fact we don't have curves.
8. "That bra would NEVER hold my boobs." We know you're moaning about what a pain it is having big boobs, but you're also reminding us that both of our boobs wouldn't fill one of your bra cups.
9. "Don't worry, I'm more of a butt guy anyway." Oh great. I would hate to disappoint you with my perfectly good breasts that I love and you should, too.
10. "Have you tried putting on some weight?" Yeah because when you eat five Krispy Kreme donuts while watching movies for a whole day, those calories go straight to your boobs.
11. "I'm so jealous of you being able to wear backless and strapless and crop tops." Um, do you have us confused with Kate Moss? 1) You might have to give backless tops a miss as you can't get the support, but we have the problem of our boobs disappearing without a bra and 2) Just because we have small boobs, it doesn't mean we have a Victoria's Secret Angel's body.
12. "Men like something to grab on to." Men should love women of all shapes and sizes, but that includes women who don't have much for grabbing. Small boobs are still sexy (and attached to human bodies that can be grabbed).
13. "I'm so jealous of all the bras you can buy." Trust us, small boob bra isn't easy.
14. "Just wait until you get pregnant, then they'll balloon!" Well, that is up there on my 'Reasons To Have A Baby' list.
15. "Your boobs aren't that small, I once dated a girl whose boobs were TINY." This isn't a compliment, it just makes us feel like you are running some sort of boob comparison website called
16. "You have no idea how annoying it is when guys stare at your boobs." To us, this is like saying, "Ugh you have no idea how annoying it is when guys stare at my tiny waist and beautifully bouncy hair."
17. "Would you ever get a boob job?" No.
This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.co.uk. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.