1. Fighting to the death for toiletry space. He gets pissed because all he has are his trusty deo-spray and toothbrush as grooming essentials, and yet he can’t find a place for them among your countless lotions, bath scrubs, body wash bottles, and facial moisturizers.
2. Making shared showers look super sexy. They can be…if you’re an acrobat. Or a fish. All that rushing water, limited space, and slippery tiles are just not conducive for the ménage of limbs that are about to get busy. Someone always just ends up with shampoo in their eyes.
3. The “Who didn’t flush the toilet?” debate. It was most likely him.
4. The dreaded smell of fresh poop still lingering in the air. Since you’re always a lady and because girls' excrements smell like flowers and springtime, again, it was most likely him.
5. Whose turn it is to clean the bathroom. When it’s that time, washing dishes seems like a walk in the park. Sweeping, scrubbing, and tidying up all that grime and muck is just not the most fun house chore to ever exist.
6. Squeezing the toothpaste tube all wrong. People who press it from the top deserve a special place in hell!
7. His annoying tendency to use your shampoo. And your body butter. And your facial wash from time to time. Can you blame him? Your products are TDF!
8. Him never lifting the toilet seat when he takes a leak. Because, you know, it just slips his mind from time to time, leaving you the uncomfortable sensation of sitting on a semi-sticky piss-stained seat.
9. Strands of hair clogging the drain. That jungle of pubic, head, and body hair is simply gross AF.
10. Any form of cockroach sitch! You know your bathroom is in trouble when roaches decide to turn it into their favorite hangout. Even worse: flying ipis!
11. Who should shower first? The answer: most probably you, since you take about an hour and a half longer to get ready. You’ve still got your shower post-production of choosing an outfit, putting on your face, and making sure your brow game is on fleek…while he impatiently waits for you to finish.
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