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13 Reasons You Should Give Up Your F*ckboy

You are better than this.

1. Every time you tell your friends you slept with him, ibang level ang hiya moYou know you are better than this and yet last night you replied to one of his "Sup" texts. WHY. 

2. You've already used all your usual excuses as to why you can't attend the new club he's DJ-ing at. If you're this close to replying with "I can't go because last night I died in a freak accident. I am texting you from the beyond," it's time to cut your losses.

3. You can no longer delude yourself into believing he knows how dumb he is and he's just being like this as a joke. Plus, one time you looked into his eyes like you wanted him to admit this was all a joke and he just stared at you like, "Nope, it is not."


4. If you have to listen to another hour of him complimenting himself while he updates his Instagram, you might have to leave the country. Yes, it's THAT bad.

5. He recently mentioned something about finding a job that will support his "party lifestyle." OKAY. Sabi mo, eh.

6. You can't keep hearing him talk about how other women are "easy" and "crazy" without wanting to find all the women he hates so you guys can form an all-girl Facebook recovery group together that he is not invited to. Which honestly you should do either way.


7. Every time you've asked him what you guys are, he messes up your hair and says, "You're funny. That's why I like you." No one can keep living like this without having a borderline psychotic break.

8. Your days are consumed with thoughts of confronting him about your relationship status if the first, second, and third attempts completely failed. Girl, hanggang attempt #100 ba ito?

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 9. The shame of knowing that you have to text him first if you ever want to hear from him is turning you into a woman you do not want to be. You are not some girl who waits for some assbag you hardly even like to text you! You are hotter than this! Now use that rage to block this dumb dumb, pleeeeease.

10. You no longer even have an answer when your friends ask you why you even talk to that guy. For a while you had, "I don't know. It's just sex." but now you complain about him so often that you're suddenly remembering how much progress they've made in the development of dildos. And that dildos will never send you Soundcloud remixes, which brings me to…

11. You've starting counting the hours you've wasted listening to his Soundcloud mixes and are finally realizing you could've spent that time listening to music that does not sound like vomit. Those hours are gone and you cannot bring them back.All that remains now is a brighter future free of "Triple Dub What 4Real Mix." 

12. You've finally realized that you can't keep thinking, Ugh, who would even sleep with this idiot? because the answer is "You would" and that is not cool, man. Not cool. 

13. He's good in bed, but he'd be better if you didn't totally hate everything else about him. Imagine his sexual skills (which are unfortunately tremendous) paired with someone you don't want to punch in the morning. It's a beautiful dream, I know. Now go out and chase that dream.

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This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.