1. You get wayyyyy too invested in the relationships of fictional characters. "It's just, like, Jim and Pam were so meant for each other," I whisper to myself as I rewatch season two of The Office for the 118th time alone in my room before crying about why I don't have that yet.
2. You have to explain to suitors why you are lighting candles and putting on music when they just came over to make out. It is called setting a mood. I have had to explain my penchant for romantic settings so many times now, but honestly, when I meet the right person, they'll be even better than I am at creating romantic settings, so it'll totally work out. (Also, I know how I sound, you guys. I know.)
3. When people under 30 are like, LOL commitment. Before 30, a lot of people aren't even thinking about being in a real relationship, which I know now but thank god no one told me this at 15. I seriously would've dropped dead of a heart attack because I was so sure love was always just around the corner. So sure!!!
4. You have a Pinterest board for your future wedding with someone you have not yet met. For a while I was low-key really into Etsy weddings. Like, I wouldn't tell anyone about it or that I was reading about it all the time, but I so was. Like, one time I ran out of Etsy weddings to read about because I'd read them all. Like that.
5. "Nice to meet you. Are you my soul mate?" is how you begin almost every interaction with someone cute. I mean, I just want to be prepared, because if you are my soul mate, I want to remember every single thing about meeting you, like the way the sun looked, what I was wearing, my first impression of you, what I think your first impression of me was. And yes, it does get exhausting doing this every single time, thank you for asking!
6. You wear your heart on your sleeve and that heart looks like a battered highway cone by now. You give your heart so freely and so openly that it gets broken a lot. Plus side? You are like the master of breakup recovery because of this. You could teach classes.
7. You have all these romantic music playlist ideas and no one to make a playlist for. God help me when I finally meet someone I actually really like. I will practically build them their own Spotify. Just thousands of playlists. And every commercial is me being like, "We should go eat tacos tonight. Just sayin'."
8. You have no idea whether you're supposed to hope for your True Love or just love yourself and be independent. Or am I supposed to do both? I'm definitely independent and I don't want to settle, but I also plan to spend an hour of my day thinking about how cute it will be when my Person proposes to me, preferably with props and a soundtrack and some element of joyful surprise. But also independence. Yes, totally that.
9. Hearing someone say, "You find love when you're not looking for it," makes you want to punch a wall. I am always fucking looking. Even when I'm purposely not looking at all, I still have one eye open and it is looking.
10. If someone says something romantic, their words stay with you for, like, 15 years. Because you play them over and over again like a song you can't stop listening to, which makes them really hard to erase when you find out this person is a diiiiiick.
11. If you lock eyes with a hot stranger, you immediately start imagining your future with them. And then life slaps you back to reality when they walk out of Pottery Barn because they were probably just staring into space. Oh. OK.
12. Your friends tell you to try to meet someone online and you're like, "Fiiiiiine." There are tons of people who have met amazing partners online, so it's totally normal and valid and just as romantic, but you had planned on a meet-cute at a supermarket involving a spilled bag of apples and kind of want to hold out for that.
13. You spend almost as much time thinking about if your crush is thinking about you as you do thinking about your crush. You have to experience this to know but it is bizarre and if anyone asked me why I do it, the answer would sound gross.
14. You spend so much time rehearsing what you're going to say to your crush and then when you finally see them, you say nothing or just talk about something random like bread. "I think about you all the time. I think you are brilliant and wonderful and special and I hate that I didn't meet you sooner but I'm glad I met you now" becomes "Yeah, bread's pretty cool. I like all kinds."
This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.