I don't know about you, but when I first heard about 69-ing in school, I was full on confused. Like, what do you put where? And how does it work? What is this simultaneous oral sex everyone's talking about? There seems to be so much that can go wrong. So many potential awks situations.
Now, having tried quite a few variations of the position, I can confirm it's loads of fun and not as scary/awkward as you might imagine. Plus, the pure beauty of 69 is that anyone of any sexuality or gender can do it. For anyone who's new to 69-ing and wants to know what on earth it's all about, Master Louis at UberKinky UK is here to explain.
"The term 69 is quite literally a symbol, which references you and your partner's body positions," he says. "Putting it bluntly: You should be matching you and your partner's mouths to each other’s genitals, so think of it as a romantic dinner for two!"
Here are his tips for making sure your 69s are 10/10s.
Showering first isn’t just about being clean—well, it is a bit—but it's also about peace of mind. While in the midst of any new, sexual experience, you want to be relaxed. You don’t want to be worrying about cleanliness as that can spoil everything.
We all know that we get naughtier the more excited we get, and this position is verrrrry naughty. So it always helps to make sure you're adequately warmed up first, this way it’ll set you up for the perfect ending.
Top or bottom?
Choosing your position within the 69 is not as easy as flipping a coin, some thought does need to go into who goes on the top and the bottom. Whoever is on top is usually in control and being on top will also allow you to control the movement, speed, and pressure of the oral sex you're giving and receiving.
Top and tail?
Don’t fancy being top or bottom? That's totally fine, there are other options. Imagine top and tailing in bed, but facing each other. This way there’s no one in full control and you both have free reign to do what you want. Things are also a little less invasive this way (no horrible unintentional penis-choking!) too and will allow you to take things slower.
Because you are both giving and receiving oral sex at the same time, it’s super important not to get lost in the moment, no matter how good your partner is or how much fun you're having. Pay attention and react to your partner's noises and movements, this will make it even more exciting for you both (instead of just focusing on what feels good for you).
Use your hands.
Don’t forget to use your hands to touch all over your partner's body, not just the "naughty" bits. Run your hands everywhere: Nipples, neck, inner thighs, whatever works for you.
You can use toys.
Now that you know using your hands is important, I’ll let you into another secret. Getting out the vibrator and using it to stimulate either yourself or your partner can make the sensations a lot more intense. You don't necessarily have to go full magic wand that you plug into the mains, you can always try something small to begin with.
This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com/uk. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.