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DON'T PANIC: Here's What To Do If You Get Semen In Your Eye

It's going to be alright but you need to act now.

Oh, hello there. I assume you're here because you currently have semen in your eye, or you think you might soon, which is fair because you're a human who hangs out with penises and this is a thing that ~*happens*~. It's also crazy painful and makes you feel pretty sure you're going blind. Lucky for you, spoke with ​Burt Ginsburg, an opthamologist and retina specialist in Houston, to find out what the hell to do when ​🎶​jizz gets in your eyes🎶​ (sung to the tune of "Smoke Gets in Your Eyes").

1. Run the eye you got it in under warm water. ​Dr. Ginsburg says that it's best to wash your eye out as much as possible with warm water and then add a warm compress on your eye as well. That will clear away any irritants in and around your eye (and should stop the stinging). Ginsburg also says it's important to make sure you're using the cleanest water supply possible since any additional contaminants in the water supply could just further irritate your eye and you do not need that right now. Maybe warm up some Fiji water?

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2. Get tested for STDs as well as eye infections. If any semen is still in your eye, Dr. Ginsburg says it could cause an infection, but you can also get STDs this way. He advises getting screened for HIV, syphilis, and Hepatitis B and C as a precaution because it's possible to contract those diseases via come-in-eye.

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3. Make a follow-up appointment with your doctor in 12 weeks to make sure you are clear of any STDs. Ginsburg says that STD testing can produce false positives or false negatives, especially if the incident just occurred. If you test negative the day after sex, you could still be positive. After three months though, you'll know for sure what the status is either way. 

This article originally appeared on Minor edits have been made by the editors.