20 Guys Reveal The Moment They Realized She Was Not 'The One'

'I realized that there was no spark and that we were better off as friends.'
PHOTO: Chris Clinton

Ever wondered what drives a guy to ghost, give up, or just straight-up dump you? Turns out, their reasons for wanting out of a relationship are just as diverse as, well, our reasons.
 
We got 20 men to recount what made them realize that the girl they were dating would never be the Kim K to their Kanye—from the mismatched life goals to the wounded egos to the exposed… feet. (Keep reading.) And be prepared to feel a little sorry for these guys; they eff up in the dating game just as badly as we do.

1. The one who just doesn’t get Star Wars

“I met this girl who seemed promising—she’s pretty, witty, fun to talk to, and has a great career. We were having a great time on a date, until the conversation turned to the topic of movies. She dismissively said that she had never seen any of the Star Wars movies and had no plans of watching any of the upcoming installments either. Normally, I’m not this shallow, but I couldn’t imagine being with someone who doesn’t understand—or worse, doesn’t even attempt to understand—something I grew up loving.” –Finn, 30
 
2. The one with whom the fireworks fizzled

“I dated this girl for a year back in college. We weren’t officially a couple, but we were ‘MU.’ One time, while on a beach trip with friends, I got drunk and tried to kiss her when we were alone. As soon as I did, I realized that there was no spark and that we were better off as friends. She tried to define the relationship after that kiss, but I could no longer commit, knowing what I knew then.” –Jan, 22
 
3. The one who chose money over love

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“I was in an LDR with a girl who lived in Canada. Things were going fine between us, until the day she started hanging out with some guy over there who made much more money than I did. Two weeks later, she broke up with me, saying, ‘I need a man, not a boy.’ I realized that how rich this other guy was went into her decision to leave me, and that I didn’t want to be with someone like that.” –Dave, 24
 
4. The one who pak ganerned all over the place

“I went out with someone who kept using trending catchphrases like ‘PAK GANERN!’ even when we were conversing in a decent manner. I’m all for differences in preferences, but using expressions like these even in situations that don’t call for it is just too much.” –Baian, 27
 
5. The one who just can’t hold a candle to mom

“When I realized that my then-girlfriend was nothing like my mom. It was a number of things, but the most glaring thing was that my then-girlfriend was kind of… stupid. My mom is smart and all-around awesome, and I tend to measure how great a girl is by how she compares to my mom.” –Jeff, 23


 
6. The one who didn’t want to have kids

“We had been together for four or five years and our parents approved of our relationship, but in bed, she would always refuse to let me finish inside her even when we were being safe. I asked her about it one time after sex, and she said ayaw niyang magkaanak. After that, I grew cold and all our dreams that we’d be together forever lost meaning.” –Uno, 36
 
7. The one who was a pain in the ash (yes, really)

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“I met this girl at a beauty pageant while I was moonlighting as a photographer, and we went on to date for a year and a half. I actually thought she was The One. We decided to live together, but a week before our rental was to start, we had a stupid argument about how I treated her ‘fans.’She called me an asshole, multiple times. Honestly, I was indeed an asshole to them at the time. But what I couldn’t shake off was how she kept pronouncing ‘asshole’ as ‘ash hole.’ I still cringe every time I remember it.” –Marc, 29
 
8. The one who didn’t get how masses go

“When she wouldn’t stay for the final blessing at Sunday Mass so she could avoid the crowd. She didn’t realize that the mass isn’t complete without the final blessing. I guess she’s one of those people who goes to church without really praying and just goes through the motions.” –Dante, 35
 
9. The one who gained a bad reputation

“When a few of my relatives who had just met my then-girlfriend came up to me and told me that she was maldita, maybe because she was aloof and didn’t try hard enough to get along with them when I brought her along to family gatherings. I had known for a while that she was, but hearing that from my relatives really drove it home for me. I continued to date her, but we didn’t last long after that.” –Jack, 31
 
10. The one whose feet didn’t pass the test

“We were just dating then, and then one time, I saw her feet in open-toed sandals for the first time. I had only seen her in closed shoes before then, and that’s when I saw that her feet were hideous. I stopped dating her after that.” –Rudy, 28
 
11. The one who never let him meet the folks

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“I was with my ex for eight years, and in all that time, she never introduced me to her parents as her boyfriend. My friends were pissed off that I was putting up with that kind of treatment, and I was desperate enough to make deals with my ex just so she’d introduce me to her parents—even just a casual lunch with her mom would’ve been fine. But she still couldn’t do it. At one point, I stopped hoping she would because it was getting exhausting.” –Frank, 25
 
12. The one with whom car rides became meh rides

“When it came to a point that when we were alone in the car together, we had nothing to talk about anymore. Having that chance to just talk when you two are alone in the car is an often-overlooked ritual that couples cherish, but with her, I just couldn’t enjoy that ritual anymore. It was a wake-up call for me that it was not the kind of relationship I wanted.” –Robert, 36
 
13. The one who did a public walk-out

“When she stormed out of the room at a party—in a rather dramatic way—because I was talking to other people at the table. She complained that I wasn’t paying enough attention to her. Funny thing is, she also knew everyone else at that table.” –Carlo, 25


 
14. The one to whom music didn’t mean much

“When I couldn’t listen to the music I liked anymore when I was with her—in the car, in my room, in the house, wherever. I’m a huge music fan, and she was just not that interested in it. I realized that I couldn’t share something that was meaningful to me with her.” –JB, 32
 
15. The one who was too good for the local ball game

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“I brought my girlfriend once to one of my basketball games. It was just a local basketball league game held at this dingy covered court that didn’t have bleachers, just a few stone benches, and most of the spectators were mga tambay. She looked uncomfortable the whole time and couldn’t properly enjoy the game because she thought the place was gross. Actually, what she said was ‘Eww.’ Total deal-breaker.” –Jeremy, 22
 
16. The one who brought out the white lies in him

“When I had to tell white lies just to please her, like say I’m home or on my way home or already in bed even when I’m out, just so she wouldn’t give me shit. I wasn’t even doing anything wrong; I was just hanging out with friends. But she wasn’t the type who went out much, so she didn’t like it when I did.” –JC, 28
 
17. The one who was BV 24/7

“When I realized what a negative, galit-sa-mundo person she was. At the start I could take that side of her, but eventually, it got to be too much. Konting mali lang, let’s say a waitress bungles our order at a restaurant, she would blow up right away.” –Prince, 26
 
18. The one who got way too physical

“When she grabbed me by the collar and started screaming, ‘Makinig ka nga sa akin; leche ka!’ and started smacking me around. All I could do was smile to piss her off even more.” –Kevin, 27
 
19. The ones who played with other ones

“Every moment I knew I was placed in one of the corners of a romantic triangle was a hint for me to step back, and a sign for me that a girl wasn’t The One. It happened thrice, and breaking away from those relationships were one of the best—and bravest because hey, I Ioved all my exes—decisions I ever made.” –Red, 28
 
20. The one who was ~The One~ until…

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“She broke up with me because she said she couldn’t handle my drinking. It hurt because I thought she was The One. The only reason I stopped thinking so was because she dumped me.” –Bong, 24

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